Never Forget Me
by throughtheforest
Summary: When Akito calls a meeting for all the members of the zodiac, nobody expects him to say this: That he has decided to have Tohru's memory erased. Kyo is devestated, and the zodiac try to make her remember. Akito's plan will alter all of the their destinies
1. Chapter 1

Hi, my name is Tohru Honda. It's been about a week since we had the visit with Akito, and I think I'm finally beginning to understand him. Maybe not a lot, but I think bit by bit he might be able to trust me. There are still a lot of things I don't understand about the Sohmas, but I'll keep trying to understand how they feel. Kyo and Yuki still haven't stop fighting, but its not as bad as it seems, and sometimes it even makes me smile. I guess fighting is their way of communicating. I'm so grateful that I can still live with them, that they accept me. Mom, I wish you could be here to meet them. You would have loved them all.

--

The wind blew in through the hole in the door, letting in a coll summer breeze. I carried over breakfast to the table, humming. It really was a beautiful day today, and I couldn't wait to go outside and maybe even visit Yuki's garden.

"Breakfast is ready!" I called, and no sooner Yuki came downstairs, yawning.

"Good morning, Honda-san." Yuki greeted cheerfully, although he was still half asleep.

Kyo came, making barely any noise with his hands in his pockets, fully dressed as though he had been up for a while. He had the same school uniform on as Yuki, but wore it slightly different, leaving the neckline open where a tie should be.

"Good morning, Kyo-kun!" I said brightly. He paused and looked at me, looking slightly annoyed.

"What are you doing, being so cheerful! It's morning!" Kyo said as he stomped over to the table. I smiled. I don't know why, but just hearing Kyo's voice made me happy.

"Breakfast time, breakfast time...Lalala..." Shigure came prancing down the hallway. "Good morning, Tohru!" He exclaimed with a smile.

"Good morning," I said, "Would you like some breakfast?"

"No, I'm alright, thank you, I've already eaten breakfast, but Kyon-kyon needs to have some breakfast, or he'll be cranky all day!" Kyo turned around and glared at Shigure and then turned his gaze on me, highly annoyed.

"I think I'll pass on your stupid--" but before he could finish, Yuki came and slammed Kyo's face into a bowl of cereal.

"Eat it, stupid cat." Yuki said, his face suddenly serious now that he was awake. Kyo let out a raged scream and jumped at Yuki. Kyo twisted out of Yuki's grip and started attacking him. Shigure glared at them disapprovingly.

"There they go again, wrecking my lovely house..." he sighed, then turned to me. "Tohru, I was wondering if you could do me a favour and stop by the groecery store on yor way back from school today."

"Sure, that's no problem." I said

"Great. I'm pleased." Shigure really did look pleased as he began walking (or maybe its better described as skipping) away, but was interrupted by a groan from Kyo.

"Does that mean I have to go with her?" he said, slightly irritated. He was hunched over with a hand pressed against his bruised face at the farthest end of the room away from Yuki, who sat at the table eating his breakfast victoriously. Kyo pouted.

"No, you and Yuki have to stay here," he said, his eyes set firmly.

"Why? Is there something we have to do?" asked Yuki. Shigure paused, and there was a strange look in his eyes. Was it guilt? Regret? I had never seen him like this before.

"Akito wishes to speak with you." Yuki's eyes widened, as they did every time Akito's name was mentioned.

"Akito?! What the hell does he want?" Kyo roared, standing up.

"Sit down, Kyo..." Shigure said, then paused, seeming to turn words over in his head. "He has...decided something." Kyo clenched his fists but sat down.

_I wonder what's wrong_, I thought. No matter how horrible Akito was to them, they still obeyed him like he was their god. _What could be so important that he would call a meeting so suddenly?_

"I hope nothing's wrong with Akito, I'll be back in a while, bye!" I said as I slipped on my shoes.

I let my hand rest on the door handle when I was outside. _Please be okay_, I thought. I let my hand slip from the door and headed to school.


	2. Chapter 2

The members of the zodiac walked up to the main house. For some reason Akito had wanted only a few of them to be there. The beautiful weather that had been in the morning was now darkening, and the clouds crowded the sky. Kyo walked with his head down, his fists clenched at his sides.

Every time he went to see Akito, he got mad. Just seeing his face made rage swell up in his chest. His thoughts were blurred. All he could think of was Tohru. Where was she? Was she alright? He shook his head pathetically. Why did he worry about her so much?

Kyo joined the others in the room Akito was in. He was lying out on his porch, a small white bird landing on his hand. His dark hair blew in the wind, and everyone could feel that he wasn't about to tell them something they wanted to hear. He slowly rose and let the bird fly away. Only when everyone had sat down and the room was silent did he speak.

"Some of you might know why you're here." He said, almost in a whisper. "Some of you might question yourself. I know why." Akito's voice was no more than a whisper, silent and harsh. Kyo clenched his fists, holding back his anger.

"You have all grown fond of Miss Honda, am I correct?" Akito said, turning around to face them. No one dared speak, but there was a sudden tension in the atmosphere that had not been there before. Akito's face darkened.

"You shouldn't have. YOU'RE ALL TRAITORS!" He shrieked, pointing at them. "Do you know what she's doing to you?! She _hates_ you all! She wants to destroy all of you! People shouldn't know about our curse, especially people like _her_." He spat out the last word as if it were venomous.

Yuki's hand twitched visibly, as if he were holding himself back from running to Akito and punching him in the face.

"HATORI!" yelled Akito as he pointed at the dragon. You will erase her memory before she does any damage to the zodiac!"

Kyo's body shook with rage. Akito could walk around playing God all the time, ordering people around and ruin everyone's lives, but he had no right to make those decisions for Tohru. Kyo yelled and jumped up suddenly, his eyes flashing dangerously, already set in his fighting stance.

"I will _not_ let you erase Tohru's memory!!" yelled Kyo.

Akito's eyes widened in surprise, the motion so fast it was as if it had never happened, for soon after they narrowed with anger.

"How DARE you go against me?" said Akito, his fists balled up at his side. "My word is LAW!"

Akito rose up his hand and it came storming down on Kyo's face.

Kyo went flying across the room and hit against the wall. The blow had revealed a wound on his left cheek and blood flowed from his mouth. He moaned and tried to get up, wincing in pain, but Akito was too fast for him. He laughed and kicked Kyo in the ribs. Kyo yelled and looked to the others for help, but they stared at him helplessly. Akito raised his fist above his head again, but was stopped by a powerful arm. Hatori stood beside him, holding him back.

"Hatori! Let go!" Akito yelled, struggling to get his arm free. "It doesn't matter what I do to little Kyo here...because now he'll know the truth." The room, which had been filled with an explosion of violent noise, was now deathly still. Everyone seemed to be frozen in place, their faces registering different kinds of shock.

Kyo was on the ground, cowering away from Akito, his hands trembling and trying to wipe away the blood from his mouth. Akito smirked.

"Look at you, you can't even stand." he said mockingly. "You, who trained in the mountains for months, who could take on even the strongest fighters." Akito's laugh shook his shoulders. "And you can't even beat _me_."

"Do you know why? Do you understand why you were frozen into place like that, why you couldn't block the blow, even though you saw it coming long before it happened?" He whispered harshly like before, to let his words sink in.

"It's because I'm your _god_, Kyo. I command you. I control you." He slipped out of Hatori's grip, but nobody seemed to notice that he was no longer held back. "You _must_ listen to me. _That is your fate_." Kyo stared at the floor, not even daring to look at him.

"Tohru hates you, Kyo. She hates you, and she's afraid of you. When you transformed into that...that _thing_, didn't she say she was afraid? You scare her and she wants nothing to do with you!" Akito's eyes glinted maliciously and he smiled.

Kyo's body shook as he clutched his stomach. Akito knelt down beside the shaking boy. He put his face beside his ear.

"You know...she's disgusted by you. She hates everything to do with you. The only way to make her stop hating you is to erase her memory." Akito whispered.

"Shut _up_!" Kyo yelled as he stood up suddenly, and ran out the door. A trail of blood followed him as he ran.

The room was once again silent. Akito paused and turned around.

"Go get him! What are you all doing, sitting down there?! GET HIM!!" roared Akito, pointing to the door. Everyone rose and left the room, not daring to speak. As Hatori was about to leave, Akito stopped him by slapping the plam of his hand against Hatori's chest.

"Tomorrow," he said. "Bring her here. You know what to do."

A/N: Please review if you like it!


	3. Chapter 3

I walked through the market place crowded with people who were busy buying things. I winced slightly as my arms began to ache. Shigure had really wanted to keep me busy! Most of the things on his list were hard to find, and pretty much irrelevent. I paused as I saw a familiar face leaning against a wall. His white hair shone in the sunlight and his eyes were closed. It seemed like he was thinking of something.

"Haru!" I called as I ran over to him. He slowly opened his eyes.

"Tohru..." He said, almost as if he had been expecting me. He laughed and ran his hand through his hair. For some reason it felt odd to hear him laugh, it was like there was no joy in his voice. He paused and looked to the sky, as if he was deciding if he should tell me or not.

"Is...something wrong, Haru?" I asked. What could be bothering him?

"It's Kyo," He said simply. My eyes widened. Kyo!

"Something happened at the meeting with Akito. Most of the zodiac memebers attended it." Haru turned to face me. "Akito said something that Kyo didn't agree with. He's upset. I think you would be the right person to talk to him." Haru said, choosing his words carefully. I had to get to Kyo as fast as possible. I bowed down.

"Thank you. I-I'll go see Kyo now." I said, my voice shaking with worry. Haru obviously wasn't open to telling me what exactly happened to Kyo and I would have to find out by myself.

I turned away from the crowd and started running toward the Sohma house. It seemed even the sky was worried, and started to cry. The rain fell down quickly, and when I reached the dirt road it was covered in mud.

My dress stuck to me and my hair was drenched. My back soon became numb from the water that was pounding down from the sky. I couldn't tell anymore if tears were streaming down my face or raindrops. I didn't pay attention to where I was going and tripped over a rock, sending myself flying off to the ground. I screamed out in pain as I landed on my arm and tried as hard as I could to push myself up again, but it was no use.

I couldn't give up. I couldn't lie here, crying. I had to get up, for Kyo. I had to see him. I promised, I _promised_ I would listen to his problems. I had said that I would understand him. I couldn't let him down when he needed me the most. I pushed myself up with all the strength I had left and clenched my teeth as my arms shook with pain. I picked up the bags and started running again. The wind blew against me hard and knocked out my breath. It seemed as though the whole world was trying to keep me away from Kyo.

I ran down the hill that lead to the Sohma house, trying hard not to fall. My chest was tight and I had almost no breath left. I pushed the door with all my might but it was no use. My arms were too weak. I tried again and again for what seemed like an eternity, but my arm was still hurt from the fall.

I slumped down against the door-frame and cried. I cried because I was pathetic, because I couldn't help Kyo. Why couldn't I reach him? He neded me! I pushed again, putting all my force into it and as it slowly opened I fell inside.

"Kyo!" I called, as soon as I burst into the door.

"What happened to you? You're all full of mud!" Shigure said, wrinkling his nose. I got up slowly and put down his things.

"I...I have your things." I said, trying to catch my breath. "Is Kyo alright?" I asked.

"He's up in his room." said Hatori, who was sitting down at the table, slowly sipping a cup of tea. Shigure turned and looked at Hatori in surprise. I bowed.

"Thank you, Hatori-san." I said and went upstairs as fast as I could and ran over to Kyo's room.

Kyo was sitting on his window's ledge, looking outisde. It was almost beautiful, seeing him there, his body nothing more but a dark form in front of the moon. He spun around as I opened his door and his eyes widened with surprise.

"Tohru..." He said, his voice choked with sadness. His eyes were full of emptiness, a kind of sadness that was indescribable.

"Kyo, what happened?" I asked. Suddenly Kyo's eyes were fierce.

"Leave!" He snarled.

"I-I don't understand." I said, shaken by his sudden anger.

"You have to leave! If you stay here something terrible will happen!" he said loudly. "I don't care where you are, I just want you to be safe!" Suddenly his voice broke. "I just want you...to remember." He rested his head on my shoulder.

I looked at him, his eyes closed as he leaned limply against me. I reached out a hand and rested it against his face. He flinched, but didn't move away. I let my fingers trail lightly against the rest of his bruises, the large purplish under his eye and across his cheekbone.

Kyo avoided my gaze, his face set in his usual look; angry, irritated. But there was another look that I couldn't figure out. It was the look in his eyes that washed over everything else completely. They were like an endless ocean of sorrow. The intensity of his pain choked off my breath and I could feel tears coming to my eyes. I opened my mouth to speak, but he grabbed my arm.

"I can't tell you." he said, still looking away. He was running away again. I could feel it. In a way it was the same as the day he transformed, but in another it wasn't. That day he was sad and confused; but now he seemed angry, and his mind was set. I realised that this could be the last moment I saw him, that he really did want to leave forever.

He let go of my arm and started walking toward the window. Every step he took sent a jab through my chest.

"Kyo, I..." I couldn't stop the tears from trailing down my face. He couldn't leave. He meant too much to me. He was too big a part of all of our lives. All those times we shared together, eating meals, doing homework...and even sitting at the top of the roof together, looking at the stars. Could he really just leave all those memories behind?

"I'm sorry Tohru," he said quietly, surprisingly calmly for all the emotion I had seen on his face a few moments before. "I'm sorry I couldn't protect you. This is the only way." My eyes widened as I realised what he was saying.

"No, Kyo, please wait!!" I yelled out desperately. He paused, half-way out the window, his head turned to the side, as if he were fighting something inside him to turn back.

"I'm sorry." he said, more quietly, and I could feel that he really was. And then he was gone.


	4. Chapter 4

Kyo sat on the branch of a tree, slouched over. Beside him was his bag filled with the few things he had prepared to bring. He cringed slightly as the memories from the night before threatened to break through the wall he had built to keep them out. Yes, he had planned what had happened, but that didn't mean that it worked out the way he had wanted it to...

_Tohru, I--_, Kyo clenched his fists at his side, closing his eyes as hard as he could. Even though he wasn't actually talking to her, the stabbing in his heart wouldn't stop. He kept seeing her face, the look she had given him before he had left. What did that mean? The way she had touched his face, so gently, he felt as if...

No. He shook his head. He couldn't think about her. But he knew that was impossible. He always thought about her, especially now that she might never remember.What he had done was necessary; it was to protect her. As much as he wanted to, and even though it would be extremely satisfying, he couldn't hurt Akito and he couldn't run away from him without being eventually tracked.

Kyo grabbed his bag with one hand and jumped off the tree, landing with a barely audible thud, and began walking down the street, his hands in his pockets. He looked up as a bus approached him. A few seconds later it stopped and the crowd of people starting flowing up the steps. Kyo watched them load on, looking like a statue, and it seemed as though he was the only person standing there beside the bus, and yet nobody noticed him. His eyes were distant, his hand resting on his bag.

The memory of her face suddenly flooded into his mind. She was looking at him with widened eyes, contemplating his broken face. As he stared into her eyes, willing her to understand, tears filled her vision and Kyo had wanted to wipe them away. But he couldn't. He had to stay distant. She wanted to ask him why he was hurt, what had happened.

And then finally, the look on her face when he told her he couldn't.

It was the worst thing he had ever experienced in his life. The look on her face was...it was...anguish. Every fiber of his body had been calling out to her in that moment, had been wanting fiercely to run over and protect her, but he knew that staying with her would only make it harder. And then, when she had called his name, it was as if his very soul had been called to. The only way to break out of something like that was to shatter your heart. There was no way that she could ever understand what he had gone through right then. And she would never find out anyway, because she would never see him again.

He grabbed the strap of his bag tightly, walking forward with the crowd, his head down. He didn't know where he would go, but it would be far. He wouldn't get off. He would keep going.

_Kyo! _

His feet were rooted into the ground. He could still hear her voice as if she were right there beside him, the sound still unbearbly fresh in his mind.

He couldn't stay, because if he stayed, he would want to see her. Maybe he even would see her, and then what? After the meeting with Akito, he had gone home, planning furiously about what to do. He had thought about telling her what had happened, so she would understand that she was in danger and that she had to get away. But of course, his curse wouldn't allow him to say anything, because Akito didn't allow it. It was like he was under a spell, an enormous weight pressed against him every time he tried to explain. He felt his heart clench and his breath catch as he thought of his other plan, the one he wished more than anything had worked.

He had wanted to run away, and take her with him. Somewhere far away where they couldn't reach them. Maybe in the country. Or a really big city. It didn't matter, he had told himself, as long as they were together. It wouldn't be a comfortable life, they would have to run all the time from whoever was sent to find them, and also struggle to make a living, since they were still pretty young. But he felt almost certain they could do it.

But of course that plan would never work.

As he knew, he couldn't tell her about what had happened, and the more he ran, the more Akito was angered. He couldn't let her live in constant danger like that...even if he could protect her, there was still a risk that one day something might slip, and she could get hurt.

Kyo clenched his fists. There had only been one way to do this all along. He had to hurt her so badly that she would never come back. He had to break her heart.

He knew his leaving would shatter her. She was so kind, compassionate...to have someone hate her that much that they would do something to her like that, she wouldn't be able to handle it. Tohru would take his advice. She would leave, she would be safe. And he had to make sure it stayed that way.

He looked up toward the bus, walking up the steps. This was it, then. He looked back, one last time at the place he called home. And suddenly a furious anger ripped through his chest. Akito was running toward the Sohma house.

Toward Tohru.

He jumped off the steps of the bus, receiving shocked yells from the people in the crowd and a few rude screams as well. He pushed past them roughly, running toward the Sohma house.

"Dammit!" he cursed loudly. He ran as fast as he could, his arms working by his side. _Don't you dare hurt her, you bastard_, he thought.

--

I was sitting outside on the steps with Yuki, who was sitting with me silently. I hadn't told him about what had happened last night. Neither Shigure nor Yuki had asked where Kyo was; they didn't really want to know, and they didn't seem to really care, either. But they both seemed to have the same worried sheen to their eyes.

Of course they wouldn't show it when I was around, but when I caught a few glimpses of them when they weren't looking, their faces told it all. Something was bothering them, too. So it wasn't just Kyo who had been bothered at the meeting. I thought back to his bruised face, his broken look.Tears sprung up in my eyes, and I wiped them away as subtely as I could with the end of my sleeve, and gulped back a sob. That gave me away, and Yuki was by my side in a split second.

"Honda-san," he said, his brow creased with concern. "What's wrong?" he paused, looking closer at my face, and his eyes became soft. "Don't cry." he said, and wiped my tears away.

"I...I can't stay here anymore, Yuki." I said, gripping the edge of my skirt between my fingers, my tears hitting the fabric. His eyes widened in alarm.

"Why not?" he asked. I could see the pain in his eyes now. I took a deep breath and looked at Yuki with the most determined look I could manage.

"I have to find Kyo."

Yuki's facial expressions changed rapidly. First he was alarmed, confused, pained, then quietly frustrated, his eyes closed. All this happened in only a few seconds, but I caught it all. When he opened his eyes, though, there was something in them that I hadn't expected. His look was understanding, but most of all he had the same determination.

"No, Tohru, _we_ have to find Kyo." his face was set. "I would never let you go alone."

For a few moments I studied his face, making sure he was really serious. He returned my stare with about as much intensity, trying to prove to me that he would follow me wherever I went. Even if it meant to he had to help his rival.

I could feel new tears filling my eyes. He was so kind. How did I deserve such good friends? Ones that would always stick by my side, that would always have kind words for me? I felt the tears rolling down my face. Yuki peered up at me with worried eyes that were ringing out with regret.

"Tohru," he said. "Tohru, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to make you cry."

"No, Yuki, you don't understand." I shook my head, laughing through my tears. "I'm so grateful," I explained, wanting to hug him and laugh. He was being so stupid! He didn't make me sad, it was the complete opposite! "I could never have asked for a better friend than you." His alarmed eyes became soft, and he smiled. He was so beautiful, so kind... I was really grateful to have such good friends.

We sat there, silently, having nothing more to say, enjoying each other's presence. I stared down while Yuki looked in the opposite direction from me, lost in his thoughts.

"Tohru," he said quietly, turning to face me once again, his eyes solemn. "There's something you should know about the meeting with Akito. About what happened to Kyo."

I felt a bolt of adrenaline shoot through my arms. The meeting. Kyo. Yuki knew, and he was going to tell me. Memories from last night flashed through my mind.

"What happened? Why was Kyo so..." I struggled with the words, trying to find some way to explain his broken face I could see in my mind.

Yuki nodded, his eyes grave. I could feel that something bad had happened, something that affected all of them very deeply.

"Tohru, after that meeting, we were all...terrified...angry. No," he shook his head, dismissing his wording. "No, more than that. We were furious." Yuki's face was almost set in a snarl, his eyes suddenly dark and flashing. "You have no clue how much I wanted to hurt him, Tohru. I've never wanted to hurt someone so badly." I believed him. There was no peace in his black eyes. He looked at me now, struggling to keep his anger down. "What happened there was something nobody should ever tell you. But know this; Akito wants you gone. He's selfish, he wants us all to himself. Having you around keeps us away from him. He may even want to hurt you. But I will never let him touch you. I will never let him get close to you."

"He wants...to hurt me?" I repeated, stunned. "Akito called a meeting to tell you he hated me?" My voice had crept up a few octaves by the end of my sentence. My hands were shaking. What had I done to make him so angry he would want to _hurt_ me?

"Shh, Tohru, no," he said, trying to calm me. "You don't have to worry. I said I would keep you safe and I meant it."

"Kyo," I said, my fear very real now that I knew what had happened. "What happened to Kyo? Why was he so hurt?" Yuki looked pained, as if he too wished that any of this made sense.

"Kyo said he wouldn't let Akito hurt you. He tried to fight him. Akito doesn't accept those who appose him."

I looked down at my hands, saying nothing, watching tears hit my palms. He had stood up for me, he had been beaten for me... _Kyo_...

"Tohru," Yuki said, his eyes dark once again, the grave anger flashing in his eyes. "I--" suddenly he broke off, turning around toward the road. "Get back!" he yelled at me, pushing me toward the house.

"What?" I asked, dazed. What was happening?

"Akito's here." he said, getting up. He stood with his arms by his sides, his hands in fists and his head slightly bowed. He was going ot fight him. "Get in the house. He has power over us, but not you."

"No!" I yelled, shaking my head. I couldn't let Yuki fight him! I saw how Kyo had been affected; I couldn't let Yuki end up like him, not for my sake!

But Yuki was beyond hearing now. He looked toward Akito with a deathly anger, crouching in his fighting stance.

Akito was walking toward the house now. He was smiling, though his black eyes seemed dangerous. His head was leaning toward the side as he acknowledged Yuki in mock politeness.

"Yuki," he said with a polite nod of his head. There was something in his cool voice that reminded me of a snake. "So nice to see you again."

Yuki didn't seem to hear anything he said. He stood his ground, his fist clenched.

"Tohru, get inside." he said. At Yuki's command, Akito's eyes flicked up to me in surprise.

"_You_..." he hissed, his eyes narrowing with hatred.

"Tohru,_ now_." Yuki urged, tensing for the fight.

Akito rushed at him, his fist raised. Yuki rushed at him as well, anger pulsing through his body. They collided, and then the fight seemed to be an uncomprehensible blur. All I could make out were fists flying and the two figures colliding and bouncing away, as if it were some kind of dance. But the two were much too furious and full of hatred for it to be anything but. The smack of fists was very audible outside in the open like this, and I watched in wide-eyed horror as blood started to splatter against the grass. Yuki's blood.

Akito laughed wickedly. "Yuki, you think you can fight me?" His expression was triumphant and smug.

Yuki stood with his shoulders slumped, his breathing harsh. There were red marks all over his face where Akito had hit him, but the worst of it was his legs and arms. Blood seeped through his clothing and ran down his arms, leaving red trails. Akito seemed to be untouched, although I had seen Yuki hit him quite a few times. The zodiac leader's laugh drew to a close, nothing more then a silent snicker as his eyes narrowed and a smirk slid across his face. I stood behind Yuki, trembling.

"There's no use fighting me, Yuki." Akito said smoothly, as if the violent fight hadn't taken place only moments before. "I will get her sooner or later, whether you put up a fight or not." At the mention of me, Akito's eyes and moved up to meet mine. In them there was pure hatred, and I was paralyzed. I began to shake and an angry smirk appeared on his face again.

At that look, Yuki threw himself at Akito once more. At the same time I yelled, "No!"

This time there wasn't much of a fight. Yuki was hurt badly and Akito still seemed to be untouched. They were so quick I could barely see who was who. Then, time seemed to slow down and Akito punched Yuki in the face, his own face contorted with anger. Yuki stumbled back, and Akito lunged in, grabbing him by the throat and squeezing. Suddenly everything was quiet except the sound of Yuki's desperate chokes as he struggled to break free. Once again Akito seemed calm and eerily confident, as if nothing had happened.

"Now, Yuki," he whispered, tightening his grip on Yuki's neck. "Now do you understand?" he chuckled under his breath. "It's futile to fight me. And it's also defiance." His black eyes grew even more dark, and he released his clutch on Yuki's throat. As soon as he was free Yuki punched him in the face, and almost as quickly Akito threw him to the ground.

I couldn't take it anymore. I broke out of my paralyzed stance and ran toward Yuki, my heart pounding so hard it felt as though it was going to burst out of my chest. I didn't care if Akito was there, I needed to help him. I couldn't just stand there while Akito was beating him! Yuki would protect me, and I had to do my best to do the same for him.

When I reached him, I threw myself to my knees and held up his face in my hands. His silver hair was matted to his face, and blood was trailing down from his temple. I swept back his hair, my heart thudding so hard it felt as if my whole body was shaking with the beat. The crimson color of his blood trailed down his snow-white skin. He winced and moaned, his head rolling to the side as he struggled with his pain unconciously. I felt myself wince as he cried out in pain. This was terrible. Nobody should ever have to go through this. Not for me. I looked up at Akito, my eyes pleading.

"You have to stop this," I said, and even to me it sounded like I was begging. I switched tactics. "Hurting them isn't going to fix anything."

"You _dare_ address me?" growled Akito. He was standing over Yuki now and glaring at me with an intense hatred. He looks like a god, I thought, as I watched him stare down at me with those powerful, black eyes.

"I don't want to hear it." he said in a normal voice, which shocked me more than if he had yelled. I was so used to Akito yelling or whispering in a cruel voice, just hearing him normally was even more frightening. I took a quivering breath and tried to convince Akito to listen to my plight.

"When I first met the Sohmas, and found out about their curse, I didn't really know what to think." I said, forcing every bit of honesty into my voice as I could. "But then, when I got to know them better, I realised I wanted to help them with their problems." I paused, watching Akito for his reaction.

Akito had stood listening to me, his head inclined like it had been when he had first addressed Yuki. The only difference was that then he had been pretending to be polite. Now there was no pretending on his face. It was full of scorn and hatred.

"You're lying." he said through his teeth. I shook my head, standing my ground.

"I want to help," I insisted, and even I could hear the edge of hysteria that tinted my voice.

"_Lies_!" he hissed, releashing the force of his anger on me. "You want to _destroy_ this family!"

Suddenly he was in front of me, grabbing my hair. I let out a small scream and winced. Akito's face was inches from mine.

"Now you will understand the suffering you've brought us," he said, snarling. "You'll regret ever being a part of this curse!"

"AKITO!" boomed a voice from behind us. "Let her go!"

Akito turned around and snarled as he saw Hatori a few feet away. He was kneeling down beside Yuki, holding his head, and glaring at Akito accusingly.

"Hatori?" Suddenly Akito's voice seemed very small.

"You've gone too far." Hatori said, gently placing Yuki's head on the ground and walking forward toward us. His hand was glowing with a blinding blue light. He was using his power. He was going to erase Akito's memories!

"No, Hatori, don't! Nobody else has to suffer because of me!" I exclaimed. Even though Akito had beaten Yuki half to death in front of my eyes, even if he had hurt Kyo so badly he would run away, I couldn't ask anybody to erase his memories. But, just like Yuki, Hatori was beyond listening.

Hatori advanced on us, and Akito crouched in a stance similar to the one Yuki had been standing in not too long ago, the whole time still holding on to a handful of my hair.

"Stay back," he warned, the hiss of anger still evident in his voice.

Now the dragon was only a few steps away, the glow of his hand very bright.

"This ends here." Hatori said, his hand darting out to Akito's forehead. And just as fast, Akito redirected Hatori's hand to me.

The whole thing seemed to have happened in slow-motion again, just as it had been when Akito had grabbed Yuki's throat. It was as if I was in a play, everything deliberately slow and dramatic. Hatori raising his hand, his arm lifting up slightly, everything in detail and slow. I could see the anger behind Hatori's eyes, anger for Yuki and for me. But there was also a sadness, and a powerful want for revenge. Revenge for the ones he had lost.

As Akito redirected Hatori's hand, things seemed to speed up. I could no longer tell what expression Hatori wore on his face, nor the details of Akito. All I could see was an incredibly bright flash of blue light.

Hatori's hand hit my forehead, and it was surprisingly warm. My eyes widened but instead of seeing Hatori all I saw were indistinguishable forms. They began to move very quickly, everything in sight a fast blur of different colors. I focused hard on what I was seeing. There was Kyo, Yuki, all the other Sohmas, their faces flashing in front of my eyes one by one, different moments I had seen...All my memories of them. They were leaving me.

I tried desperately to shut out whatever was taking my memories, but it was too late. It was flipping through all of them so quickly, it was hard to tell which was which. They were showing me everything, from the very beginning; my first meeting with Yuki and Kyo. It continued as our friendship builded up. Kyo and Yuki and I, holding hands, walking toward our house...

_No!_ I yelled inwardly at whatever it was that was erasing my memories. I fought hard, throwing every thought of protection against it, but it was no use. It continued searching for every memory of the Sohmas I had.

The three of us at school, Kyo irritated, Yuki's real laugh for the first time...and the final memory, Kyo, smiling to me, his eyes soft.

I opened my eyes to find a boy about my age looking down at me with tear-streaked eyes. He didn't seem to notice his tears, or care much at all. His hair was a mess and he had bruises on his face.

"Tohru?" he whispered, holding me up, but cautious not to let me touch his chest. That meant something. He didn't want me to touch him because...

"Kyo...?" I said, but the flash or memory disappeared as soon as it had come.

"Yes!" he said, gripping my hand desperately. "Yes, I'm here."

During that moment, when I realised he was acutally there with me, it seemed as though the whole world was lifted off my shoulders. And then, when that weight was gone, I realised something that filled me with the happiest joy I had ever felt; he was back! Kyo was back, he was here, with me! With him there, beside me, I felt incredibly warm and safe and...happy.

"You're back," I said, and smiled, but for some reason that small motion seemed even strained to me. Kyo winced as I did, proving my point, but then smiled back at me with tear-streaked eyes, both of us laughing. It seemed that maybe laughing right now would lessen the pain.

"Yeah, I'm back," he said, and then lightly rapped the top of my head with his knuckles like he always used to do. "You idiot. If you would have listened to me you wouldn't be like this right now." He scorned, although it was the thing the farthest from scorn, sadness filling his eyes and his attempt at a smile.

"I couldn't leave you, Kyo." Kyo gripped my hands even harder, his eyes suddenly desperate.

"Than don't!" he said, his words rushed and hoarse. "Don't leave! Stay with me, Tohru. Stay. Remember!"

"I..." I could feel my voice trailing off by itself, my mind wandering dangerously close to the line between consciousnesses.

"Tohru!" Kyo exclaimed, not so much calling me as shouting his distress.

The darkness was back again, embracing me, filling my eyes, my mind. But even through the darkness I could feel Kyo's arms around me, his voice calling me. I clung on to that harder than I had ever held onto anything.

"Tohru!" he called again. I fought harder, pushing against the darkness, forcing it away, but every time I escaped it it pushed back with twice the strength.

And then everything was silent.


	5. Chapter 5

"Tohru!" he yelled, his voice choked and his grip on her alarmed, panicked. Every sound was drown out by the constant noise of the falling rain.

"No!" he yelled out, pained, shaking his head in quick successions. "No, no, no!"

He held her in his arms, once again the statue he had been before. Those words they had just spoken; were they to be their last? Her light hair spilled over his arms, and he pressed his face against hers. He had never felt as he did right now, as if his chest was slowly ripping apart, as if someone had dug a knife so deep into his chest it would never be removed, that it would stay there for all eternity, lodged in between his ribs, so close to his heart that every breath he took shuddered in agony, and still the knife ripped.

"Oh god," he whispered, pressing his pained face to hers, his eyes closed and his body shaking with unshed sobs. "Oh god, no, no, please...Tohru!"

He felt his tears roll down her face. His body protest as he pressed his bruised face against hers, but he didn't care. He was beyond feeling any physical pain. She was gone, she was gone...he could have repeated those words a thousand times, and yet he knew that nothing could bring her back now.

He held her in his arms, his breathing quick and ragged, the pain in his chest pulsing in time with every breath he took. He didn't know how long he sat there, with her in his arms. Time didn't seem to matter anymore. Nothing seemed to matter anymore. As he looked at her, he realised that it was the closest they had ever been, and now it was the last time they could ever be. And yet, even though they were so close, they were a world apart, their memories separating them forever.

"Hatori!" Kyo yelled, his voice echoing off the walls. Hatori was behind him, leaning against the frame that lead up to the house. His dark hair covered his face, and he, too seemed motionless, silently staring at Kyo with hardened eyes. Kyo snarled. "How could you? How could you do this to her!"

"It was a mistake!" Hatori spat out in disgust, his voice rising to come to almost the same volume. Kyo flinched, his eyes so full of pain. Hatori put his hands out in front of him, looking at Kyo almost pleadingly. "There's nothing I can do to fix this now, can't you see that?"

Kyo felt a pang of anger flash through his chest, and he clenched his teeth. Hatori's words were so uncompassionate, as if he didn't care at all about what he had done. But his eyes told a different story. They were moist, but barely noticeably. He regretted what he had done immensely. The only person to blame for what had happened was Akito.

Kyo knew this, and yet he didn't believe it himself. It was his own fault, all his fault that this had happened! If he had gotten here faster, if he hadn't had run away...he should have known she wouldn't have left! Kyo forced his eyes shut, clenching his jaw. He had underestimated her affection for him, he had believed that she would let him go like he was just another passer-by.

"Stop it." Hatori's commanding voice was harsh. "I can see what your doing and I've been there before. There's no use torturing yourself over what happened."

Kyo flinched at his words. They hurt, and it was as if he had been lashed by a whip. But they were true; he couldn't deny that. He remembered Hatori's sad story, how he had erased his own wife's memory, and yet it did nothing to soothe the pain. Every second that he thawed from the numbness, he could feel the pain even more clearly. He turned his head away from Hatori, looking back on Tohru, shattering his heart once again.

"I'm not you, Hatori." Kyo said without looking away from Tohru's face.

"Kyo, we have to go." Hatori said quietly. Kyo didn't hear him. He was lost in his own thoughtless, numb, painful world once again. "I can't leave you here like this." Kyo spun around, his eyes fierce.

"And I can't leave!" he yelled. He turned back slowly, his back arching over as he held her. She looked so peaceful, her eyes closed and her face gentle, as if she were sleeping. But there was something about the shadows under her eyes and the set of her mouth...something that told him that she had been scared. He doubled over in pain as he remembered the past events over and over in his mind.

Hatori watched him cry, clutching the girl but making sure she didn't touch his chest, and he felt his own agony pulse through him. Nobody but the zodiac members could understand how he felt. To not be able to hold those you love, to have no physical comfort...it left its mark on you. Right now he knew that Kyo wanted more than anything to be able to hold her for once, this last time, but he held back because he wanted to be able to be with her, to _really_ be with her, as a human boy and girl, not some cursed animal. He closed his eyes, trying to block out the pain, feeling his own moist eyes. Even though right now he felt frustrated, angry...beneath all that was sorrow. An endless ache. All of this reminisced of his own life, and he couldn't take it. And it had been his fault. He had done it.

Hatori walked up behind him and placed his hand against Kyo's forehead.

"Sleep," he said softly. There was a faint glow to his hand. It wasn't the brilliant shine of his memory-erasing powers, but a duller shine, one that would send the receiver into another place, one that, he hoped, would be much less painful than the one they were in right now.

Before everything was lost once again, before the darkness consumed him completely, one thought remained in Kyo's mind. Everything grew dark once again, and he felt himself being pulled into the nothingness. The only thing he could see was Tohru; it was as if they were in space, surrounded by darkness. The only light came from her, as if she were glowing.

He took a few shaky breaths, looking at her with what he assumed was a blank face, but was the complete opposite. He couldn't distinguish the difference between emotions anymore; they all hurt the same, there was no difference.

"Tohru," he said, his voice controlled. "I want to tell you I'm sorry. I shouldn't have left you. I was wrong." his eyes were distant, recalling the past, and yet at the same time so very present as he lived through every agonizing second of seeing Tohru. He touched her hair, moving it away from her face and leaned in as close as he could get. "Thank you. Thank you so much for staying for me. For everything." And when he opened his eyes, he was back in reality, and numb.

Kyo choked off a sob, and fell down on top of her, still holding her hand. In a puff of smoke he transformed into the orange cat, unconscious. Although he was in his cat form, he didn't seem healthy. His fur was rustled and his eyes were strained. He laid his head on her, his paws resting against her side.

And then Kyo, too, joined the darkness.

-----------

A/N: Please review, I really love hearing what you think of my fic


	6. Chapter 6

The wind chimes sang their beautiful song as the wind blew them against each other. The breeze blew gently against Tohru's face, and she slowly began waking up. Somewhere close by she could hear water dripping and splashing against the rocks. The warmth and the light of the sun spilled over her face, opening her eyes slowly and looking out toward the doors of the porch she was laying beside. Outside there was a pond and a garden full of flowers of all kinds. Tohru's eyes widened as she looked at the garden with sparkling eyes, a smile spreading across her face. She didn't know where she was, but she knew that she immediately liked it here.

She was lying in blankets, her head resting on a pillow. Her bed was next to a door leading to a porch, but besides that the room was empty, but at the same time well kept. As she sat up to get a better look at her surroundings, she felt her knees bump against something and heard the clatter of dishes.

* * * * Tohru's POV * * * *

I mumbled curiously, looking over at what it was that was on my lap. I soon discovered the source of the clattering; there was a tray with breakfast laid out on it, fork, knife, napkin and all.

"Wow! This looks great!" I realised, after looking a little more closely, that I had no clue where it had come from, or who made it. I jumped as I heard a soft, handsome chuckle, and looked up to find Yuki sitting down inches away from me, staring at me with those attractive, laughing eyes.

"Good morning, Honda-san," he said, attempting to stifle his quiet laughter. "Nice to see you awake again." He smiled his usual smile; a sad one. I had seen him at school a lot, since he was in my class, and I had never seen him smile. I mean, really smile. See, you can tell when a person is really smiling, and when they're not. It has to reach their eyes. They seem to have a light in them, a kind of happiness that spreads around to anyone near enough to see it. But with Yuki… his eyes stayed black, with a light shining dimly.

He looked at me now with those eyes, his head tilted to the side, half-smiling. Even though he seemed sad, he was still very good-looking, the Prince of the school…and he was sitting inches away from me! I could feel my face turn red, and my heart started pounding. I really didn't know what to say around Yuki. And why was he here in the first place?

"H-hello Sohma-kun," I said shakily. I tried to be as formal and polite as possible. I didn't want him to think that I was being disrespectful. "What brings you here?"

"Really," Yuki started, his brow creasing slightly. He walked over and sat down beside me, touching his fingertips to my face. He said very quietly, his eyes dark and searching. "Why are you being so formal, Tohru?" I stared back at him with widened eyes, confused. He paused, catching his thoughts, and looked at me straight in the eyes. "You don't…remember anything…about me, do you?"

I looked at Yuki's face closely since the first time I woke up. His gaze was searching; his eyes darted back and forth, looking for something in mine. His face was bandaged up in certain places, covering a few bruises on his face. He looked pretty….terrible. It really surprised me; I had only seen him look perfect. But now he was far from it. Dark shadows coloured his eyes. His silver hair, almost always an attractive mess of a style, was now in disarray. My heart began to race as I stared at Yuki, concern washing over me.

His fingers slipped past my cheek, his palm against my face. We were very close now, and it was almost as if he was trying to get as close as possible, hoping that maybe the closer he got the more pressure forced me to remember. My eyes widened and my heart raced, and I could feel my body suddenly turn rigid. I could only stare into his deep, dark eyes.

"Tohru," he said quietly, as if trying to call back my memories. But I really couldn't remember anything specific about him, and his closeness was sending my thoughts in a quiet whirl.

"Yuki, I…" I moved back a bit away from him, his closeness now becoming uncomfortable. "I don't know what you mean." I looked at his face to see his reaction, but there was nothing. I tried to lighten the suddenly grim atmosphere. "But I do remember this; I've always wanted to get to know you better. So I'm very grateful for you being here to visit me." I paused, looking into his searching eyes. My answer didn't seem to satisfy him; he looked away, his brow creased in a frustrated glare directed at the floor. I put my hand on his tentatively; trying to quell whatever it was that seemed to be bothering him.

"Try to remember." he said, his eyes suddenly dark, his hand on my face holding pressure. "Tohru, you have to _try_."

I stared at my plate with a muddled expression, as if willing it to reveal its secret. The more I thought about it, though, the more I realised that I really didn't know where I was. I tried to think of the last thing I remembered, but the only thing I reached was a black wall in my mind.

_I don't understand_…, I thought. _What happened to me? Why can't I remember anything? _Suddenly I yelped as I felt my body being pushed back and driven to the floor by a hurtling force that exclaimed loudly, "TOHRU!"

I hit against the floor, along with my breakfast, and stared up into Uo's face, who was grinning widely and had her arms wrapped around my neck.

"Tohru!" she exclaimed again, with less volume and less force. She smiled again, happy but scolding at the same time. "I was so worried about you!" She pummelled me on the head. "Don't you ever do something like that again! I was just about ready to go after those guys with my pole!" she gripped at the air as if wishing she was holding the pole right now.

"Uh, um, Uo!" I said, dazed, fumbling to find my words. I considered apologizing for making her worried, but then realized that I didn't even know why she had been worried, and so decided to ask the next best question. "Um, what exactly did I do?"

"That's a pretty long story, and I think you should eat your breakfast before I tell you." Uo paused and looked around. "Where is your breakfast, anyway? I was pretty sure I told that damn boy to bring it to you this morning…" she growled, sneering. I mumbled nervously, my hands outstretched to Uo, trying to hold her back if she tried to run off on some sort of damn-boy-pummelling spree and grab her pole.

"If you're looking for Tohru's breakfast, you're sitting on it." A solemn voice said from the doorway. Uo and I looked up, surprised, and found Hanajima standing by the doorway, her long midnight black hair flowing down her back. "Hello, Sohma-kun." she said, nodding toward Yuki. He nodded back stiffly, seeming to be lost in his thoughts. She turned her gaze on me now, her eyes softening as she smiled slightly. "Tohru, I'm so glad you're feeling better."

"Ah, I'm sorry Tohru," Uo said, attempting to restore the surviving pieces of my breakfast. She winced.

"No, really, its fine!" I blurted out. I paused as they looked over at me incredulously, and then said more quietly, "Thank you. I'm not exactly sure what happened, but for some reason I feel as though you two took good care of me."

"You would have done the same for us," Uo said with a grin. She paused then, toying with her hair that was pinned back, as if thinking about something, and then gasped, looking at me with excited eyes. "Tohru," she started, her voice rising with her excitement. "Do you know where we are?"

I paused and looked around. It actually wasn't familiar, especially the pond and the garden outside. The room was very simple, and the door gave absolutely nothing away as to what was on its other side.

"I really have no clue," I admitted, curious. "Where are we?"

At this point Uo seemed as though she was just about ready to blurt out the whole story in one breath, but instead began in a quick rush while gripping my blankets, "You won't believe it, Tohru! Your father bought this house a few years ago."

"This is my father's house?" I exclaimed, surprised. They nodded. I couldn't believe it! My father had a house in Japan this whole time, and I hadn't even heard about it! I was itching to ask more, but then I suddenly realized something. "But why am I here? I don't remember much…" I said, unsettled. I didn't remember getting hurt, and I definitely didn't feel sick…just a little uneasy about not remembering what had happened.

"Well, it turns out that you fell down the steps at your grand-father's house." Uo said, her eyebrows slanted with concern. "They brought you here afterwards, explaining what happened. The doctor said you were fine, and you just had a few scratches and bruises from the fall, but I knew you'd tough it out. Your grand-father barely left your side, that is, until a few minutes ago, when you decided to wake up."

"It was strange," Hanajima said quietly, and quite creepily, a fan up to her face as she gazed off into the distance. "You weren't hurt physically enough to put you into unconsciousness, but you were. You seemed to have withdrawn into your thoughts…" she trailed off, her eyebrows slanted slightly.

"How did I get here?" There was no way grandpa could have driven me. Last time he tried to drive he nearly put us in the ditch. Yup, ojisan was really quite the driver…

"That…_idiot_ brought you back." She sneered at the mention of whoever-it-was' existence. For some reason that reaction rang a bell, but I couldn't quite remember _why_. I looked at her, puzzled. "Kyon-kyon." she added, as if that would help me anymore. I heard Yuki, who had been silent during most of the exchange, scoff at the nickname. For some reason this reminded me of school, but I couldn't see the face in my mind. Hanajima nodded and sat down next to me, her long, black locks bouncing off her back.

"Tohru, dear, if you don't remember, maybe its best to wait until you get your memories back to tell you the full story." she patted my hand affectionately.

"Thank you," I said, smiling. I was so thankful to have friends like this, who would worry about me and keep me well while I was unconscious for days. She nodded in encouragement, and looked over at my spilt tray of food with dismay. I shivered slightly; if I didn't know better I would almost say that I could feel the waves she was putting off toward Uo.

"Arisa, looks like because of you we'll have to be making Tohru a new breakfast." she shot a look at Uo that suggested if she didn't…

Uo frowned slightly. She didn't like it when Hana threatened to use her powers on her. She was one of the only people I know that didn't run away screaming. After a look at me, though, she softened up.

"Well ok. But don't get too lonely, okay Tohru? And Princey, don't try anything tricky. We'll be right back." Uo glared threateningly over at Yuki and then got up and they both slid out the door.

It was silent.

Yuki and I were the only ones left in the room. He had mostly remained quiet during the whole thing. I looked over at him, rigid once again. His presence shocked me, and I wasn't quite used to seeing his face yet. When our eyes met he looked away quickly, and so did I, but soon after I peeked up. He was looking away, frustrated, but in some kind of self control. I could almost hear the battle raging in his head. My face flushed, and I could feel the blush coloring my cheeks. He couldn't be that frustrated because of me…right?

Suddenly he got up from his chair, pushing it back against the floor. I got up too, following his gaze. He was going to leave, and I didn't blame him, but I felt my heart flutter with disappointment. I felt bad for making him want to leave. We both stared at the floor awkwardly, him frustrated and me not really knowing what to say. He moved closer to me once again, and put his hand on my arm.

"Bye, Tohru." he said, and ruffled my hair uncertainly. I looked up into his eyes and smiled, a bit confused. He smiled one last time and began walking out the door. Before he was half way out, I started, realizing that I might not see him for a while.

"Thank you." I said suddenly, not really understanding why I was saying it, but feeling that somehow I _needed _to. He turned around, his gaze questioning. I swallowed and started again, trying to make more sense of this.

"Thank you," I repeated, and then said a bit awkwardly, "For still being my friend." The last part has seemed to rush out automatically. I didn't know why I said it, just knew that I meant it. I felt so grateful that he was here, checking up on me and trying desperately to help me, from whatever it was that I couldn't know about.

He stood as still as stone, staring at me, looking completely and utterly shocked by what I had said. And then I couldn't help myself….I started laughing. At first it was a giggle, and I tried to cover it up with my hands, but couldn't help myself and exploded into full-out laughter. He watched me laughing, serious and shocked as ever.

"I-I'm sorry," I said through the laughter, my eyes tearing up. "I don't really know why I'm laughing, it's just…well, you looked so funny! The expression on your face..ahah..haha!"

I started doubling over. And then suddenly, I heard something beautiful; he started laughing too. I looked up in surprise, and stopped laughing, the shock of hearing his real laugh stopping me. He too was laughing very hard, and smiling so brightly I feared it would consume us all. My mouth dropped in amazement. He was even more beautiful when he laughed, and especially when he smiled.

"Tohru," he said, walking over to me, still smiling brightly. He placed a hand against my hair. "I promised you that I would stay your friend, no matter what happened to you. So you're welcome." And then he walked out the door, and was gone.

I felt a bit flustered after having him so close by, his hand on my face, but I was happy that he was happy. _But what promise is he talking about? _I wondered. _He seems to know me so well, and it seems as though we might have been friends once…but I just can't remember! _

For some reason, that reminded me of something. I could feel the memories there, as if they were hidden. _Yuki and I, outside…Yuki, giving me a gift…Yuki, kissing me on the forehead…_ I gasped audibly at the last one, my heart racing. Whatever they were, if they were memories or dreams, they were so fragmented I couldn't be sure of what they meant, but that last one…I shut my eyes tight, trying to make sense of all of this. I tried to put those thoughts back together, but they had gone as fast as they had come; I couldn't remember a thing.

Uo came through the door, holding up a tray with a similar breakfast to the one she had knocked over, staring off at the direction Yuki had left in, her eyebrows raised. She turned to look at me.

"What the hell was that?" she asked. I started giggling, which lead to more laughter.

"What was the joke?" Hanajima inquired when she reached the room, holding a glass of juice in her hand. That made me laugh even harder.

"Oh god, I think princey drugged her!" Uo put her hands on her face in horror. I shook my head quickly, smiling.

"No, that's not it! It's just…" I was cut off by a piece of flying food that hurtled into my mouth. I made a muffled exclamation.

"Time to eat!" Uo exclaimed, smiling wickedly. I slowly began to eat, realizing how hungry I was. "And," she continued, putting up her index finger in emphasis, "I think it's about time we tell you where you are!" I nodded in encouragement, my mouth stuffed with food.

"This beautiful, awesome house," Uo said. "Is yours!" I stared wide-eyed at my two friends before my jaw dropped and I exclaimed,

"_What_?!" I shrieked, more surprised than I had ever been in my whole life.

"Yup," Uo said, putting her hands on her hips. "You father left this house for you and your mom before he died." She smiled. Hanajima nodded in agreement.

"You grand-father came across the bills the other day…it seems he's been keeping it up for quite some time, but he kept forgetting it existed…" Hanajima trailed off, and shrugged her shoulders, at a loss for words at grandpa's forgetfulness. I laughed at the thought.

"Yup, that sure does sound like ojisan." I said.

"He'll be moving in here with you in the next few days. Looks like you won't need renovations after all!" Uo said, a satisfied look on her face. She was happy that we finally had somewhere suitable to live in.

"Could you guys show me the rest of the house?" I asked, very excited to see the rest of it. "I'd really like a tour of the garden, too!"

"Sure thing!" Uo said. "Tour of Tohru's new house, part one! Please follow me in this direction to the garden."

I contented myself by looking out around us at the beautiful design of plants and stones, with a small pond. It was all very calming. I started envisioning all the things I could do out here. And then, an idea came to me. For one reason or another, I really wanted to plant a garden. And have strawberries in it. I smiled slightly, and I knew that I would love this house. Life finally seemed to be mending itself after Mom's death.

"Alright, let's get to work!"


	7. Chapter 7

The classroom atmosphere was full of excitement at the end of class. We had just finished writing a test, and the students were babbling endlessly about which answers they had forgotten, but mostly they were talking about the masked ball that was coming up soon; banners and posters made by the school council covered the walls. It was a beautiful day outside, a cool breeze blowing through the warm rays of the sun. Outside people were milling about excitedly as their classes finished.

With my head leaning against my palm as my elbow rested on the desk, staring out the window, I felt pleased. I had just finished my first test since the accident, and it had gone pretty well! I had thought that I was going to fail it, since I've been having some trouble remembering things ever since I fell and hit my head. But the good thing about getting hurt is that Yuki Sohma, the Prince of our high school, now smiles at me, and it appears that we're friends! It goes to show how good things can come out of a bad thing. It's strange how he seems to know me really well, even though I don't recall ever befriending him, or talking to him at all… But the way he looks at me, almost softly, and his smile is always hushed, and sad… It seems that the Yuki fan club is mistaking his kindness for something more, and they kind of scare me when they glare like that…

"Honda-kun, are you going to the ball?" asked Hana-chan from the side of my desk, who had up until recently been discussing food recipes with some classmates. She cocked her head to the side and smiled silently, her eyes questioning. I tried to remember who she had been talking to, but I struggled. Lately I had lots of trouble remembering all my classmates, but they realized this and dealt well with it.

"Uhhhhh—" I said, flustered. The very thought of the ball made my face flush as I momentarily dreamed of dancing with Yuki, him looking into my eyes like he had the other day, when he visited---

"Aha!" exclaimed Uo, pointing at me accusingly, grinning widely. "You want to go with Sohma-kun, don't you?"

"N-no! Of course not! I wouldn't dream of it." I stuttered, at a loss for words. I added, a little less shocked and feeling a lot more modest, "I mean, we're so different. He's so beautiful, and popular…I would just feel not right talking with him." She really looked confused.

"But you two seem to be getting pretty close lately!" she teased, smiling slyly. "What about that day we walked in on you two, at your house? Things seemed to be going pretty well." My heart stuttered at the very thought. Yuki had gotten pretty close to me then, staring into my eyes. I liked Yuki. I really did. He was charming and beautiful and made my thoughts whirl like crazy…but there was just something about him. Something not quite right. Something missing.

"No," I said quickly. It seemed a little too brusque, so I decided to add, "We talk sometimes, but really he's just so amazing I don't know what to say!" That answer didn't seem to satisfy her and she rolled her eyes.

"What about Kyo-kun?" Hana asked, almost quietly. My brow furrowed in confusion. It wasn't the first time I had heard about Kyo. He was supposedly a boy in my class that many girls liked, but I had never seen him. Then she looked concerned.

"Sorry." she amended, still speaking quietly. "I suppose you still don't remember him." Uo and Hana hadn't brought him up in a while; the last time they had talked about him had been weeks ago. Uo quickly jumped into the conversation, maybe to interfere. Sometimes they really confused me. Ah, I loved my friends.

"Well, I'm sure glad there's no more work!" Uo exclaimed.

"Aahhh, finally! Those tests are done!" I said in agreement. I stretched my arms and legs delightedly at my desk, closing my eyes and smiling in a satisfied manner.

"Do you think you succeeded?" Hanajima asked from the desk to my right. I nodded enthusiastically.

"I'm pretty sure I did! I mean, how else could I have done, with all your help?" Hana and Uo had stayed at my place and had been helping me study for the tests that we had today. I looked over at Uo, who sat in front of Hanajima.

"How do you think you did, Uo?" I asked. Uo looked up from her drooping-head-laying-on-desk misery. She grumbled something that vaguely sounded like, "I failed it." but I couldn't be sure, because it also might have been "I'm going to kill the teacher for even thinking of giving us this stupid test…." Well, anyway, both sounded like something Uo would say.

As we were gathering our books and getting ready to go home, I looked out the window and admired the beautiful, sunny day. Students were walking home, some together, some alone, and just about everyone was glad that the day was finally over. My gaze slipped over to a few trees on the school grounds, and the person under them. I left my books on the table as I got closer to the window. Uo and Hana noticed my observation.

"Tohru…?" Uo asked, as if she had been saying something to me and I hadn't been listening.

I looked closer out the window, staring at the person under the tree. He was a boy, and seemed to be about my age. It was really strange that I hadn't noticed him before, since his hair was bright orange. But it almost made sense that he would go unnoticed; he seemed to almost blend in with the background of the world.

His face was blank, not quite lost in his thoughts, but not quite in the present, either…like he was devoid of emotion. He seemed to just be staring. I noticed now that his clothes were baggy, his hair was a mess and he seemed unhealthy, like he hadn't slept for a long time. And that was all I could see from here. _If he looks that bad from way up here, I wonder how he looks from up close_… I thought_, what could be wrong with him_?

Then he turned around and looked at me. He held my gaze for only a few seconds, but for some reason it left a shock on me. His eyes spoke so much; it was like they were screaming. He looked at me, and in his eyes there was nothing. They were empty. But at the same time they showed so much pain, and suffering.

I realized in a shock that his eyes seemed to be screaming out to me. Once again I had the same feeling as when Yuki had come to see me, that I knew somehow what it was that they wanted me to do, but just couldn't. My brow creased with concern, and then his gaze flicked away, and with his hands stuffed casually in his pockets, he walked away.

"What are you looking at?" Uo asked from one side of me, as Hana subtly looked around as well, and I knew they were both just as curious as I was.

"Mm, nothing. Just thought I saw someone familiar." I said, pensive. I wonder who that was. He didn't look like he was from around here, judging by his looks and the lack of people surrounding him.

---------

Kyo walked through the crowd of students, shrugging and pushing his way through them, ignoring their indignant yelps and curses. Words were meaningless; a simple buzz in the back of his mind as he concentrated on the task at hand. He shrugged the bag on his back into place, gripping the strap in his hand to hold it there.

He had just gotten his last look at Tohru. He wasn't sure if it was just his imagination or not, but he had almost sworn he saw some recognition in her eyes…

But soon he wouldn't be able to see her looking back at him anymore. He planned to take the next train out of here, and travel Japan. As long as he got away. He knew the family wouldn't be pleased, and that they would find him, but he would run. _No, not running_. he reminded himself. _Just simply…going_. He let the numb state of mind wash over him once again, like he had learned to do so easily lately, to feel nothing at all.

And then he bumped into someone who was quite determined not to move away.

"Hey, would you mind-" he began to snarl, and then noticed who it was standing in front of him. Yuki glared out from under his silver hair.

"Where are you going?" he asked darkly, a strange contrast from his seemingly casual stance. It was probably just to throw off all the other students clamouring around.

"Last time I checked that was none of your business." Kyo raised his eyebrow in annoyance. Normally, meaning a few years ago, Yuki would have scoffed and insulted him, maybe even punch him in anger. But now Yuki seemed to be changed. Instead he narrowed his eyes and stood in front of Kyo, blocking his way.

"You can't leave." Yuki stated, as if he had read Kyo's mind. This bothered him, and he scowled.

"Get out of my head," he snapped, and tried to push his way past Yuki, who pushed him back.

"You know, things would get better if you didn't just sit around and mope." Yuki said flatly. Kyo lived with Shishou now. How Yuki had come across the knowledge of what Kyo had been doing in his spare time lately was a mystery. Now anger at his cousin filled him, the only real thing he had felt in a long time, and he thrived on it.

"Better?" he said harshly. The very word seemed to hide untruthful prospects in itself.

"Yes." Yuki said, saying the word heavily, as if his cousin had troubles understanding simple speech. "I've seen it. There's a way to fix this."

"_Fix this_?' Kyo exclaimed, and then clamped his mouth shut quickly. He balled his hands up into fists at his side, struggling with his anger. "There's nothing you can do."

"Believe what you want," Yuki said harshly, without compassion. "But I've seen it. She's beginning to remember."

"Don't even dare to say that!" Kyo yelled, throwing a punch to Yuki's face, and he scowled, wiping off the blood on his split lip. "She will never remember, and it's hard enough thinking that every second without you echoing it in front of me now!" Kyo's breathing was harsh, and Yuki scowled at his cousin.

"I've visited her, and talked to her. She told me, '_Thank you for still being my friend_.' That was in response to a promise we made each other a long time ago, that we would still stay friends, even if she got her memory wiped." Kyo cringed at the mention of that, as if the thought tore at his mind. "And there's been other times. In class, when I smile or talk to her, sometimes she looks confused, she pauses, and for a brief second I see something, something in her eyes. You can't tell me that all this is in my head. It's real, Kyo. She's remembering." Kyo looked suddenly weakened, and his grip on his cousin loosened until his arms remained useless by their sides. He stared off to the side, his face hidden.

"No." he said, although to what, Yuki couldn't guess. He decided to keep trying, even though he knew the Cat to be a lost cause.

"I understand why you're staying away from Tohru." Yuki said. "Speaking or seeing her directly would cause too much shock, especially if someone brought up a vital memory, and she figured out that she had forgotten." he paused. Kyo was unresponsive. "But that doesn't mean you have to listen to yourself," he added. Still nothing. "Don't leave. I've been trying to make her remember, but I'm not enough. She needs you, the stupid Cat that you are. She needs her memories of you." Kyo clenched his jaw. He wanted to retreat in himself, return to that numb reality, where he felt nothing, where he was with Tohru, if only in his mind, and everything was without feeling, without emotion; painless.

"Look," Yuki's eyes flashed angrily, and he closed them briefly, breathing in and trying to calm himself. When he opened his eyes, he was struggling to say something. He seemed to want to yell, but he needed to stay quiet, to not attract attention to himself. But every part of his body wanted to yell, wanted to punch his cousin. _What a fool_! he screamed in his head, but stayed calm. "Look…I know, okay? I know how you're feeling." Kyo's eyes widened, shocked, and then narrowed so drastically that even Yuki felt alarmed.

"You shut up." Kyo snarled, speaking silently. "Shut your _goddamn mouth_. You have no clue how I feel." He grabbed the center of Yuki's shirt in his fist, and his cousin stared back at him blankly, taking it all in. "Have you ever felt your heart being torn out? _Huh_? Have you ever woken up every single morning, and realized that no matter how much you love her, no matter how much you pray, she will never, _ever_ remember?! Is that how you feel!?" Kyo was breathing heavily in his anger. There was a pause as Yuki looked into his eyes.

"Yes." he said seriously. And he had felt like that. His days had been spent in his room, locked up as he worked.

"Shut up!" he howled, and threw his cousin back, making him stumble slightly. But Yuki never took his eyes off his cousin.

"Yes, I know exactly how that feels. You're not the only one who's suffering, Kyo, and if you took a moment and think about how anybody but yourself is feeling, you would realize that!" their fight seemed to be drawing a bit of attention from the students, but neither of the boys cared. They were too deep into their anger to even notice each other. "You're so self-centered, and you always have been. This world isn't all about you." Yuki yearned for a fight. It was the only reason he was pushing Kyo so far. Everything else lately had seemed unreal, like a dream he was floating in, as if he were detached from the world…

Physical pain and anger were the only things that were fiery enough to awake his soul, to remind him that he was here. That he was real. "Get over yourself." he spat. Kyo remained silent, staring at the ground, suddenly looking ages older than he really was. Yuki noticed for the first time in days the terrible, dark hoops that rested under his cousin's eyes, his dishevelled hair, his pale face…and he felt a pang of something, and then confusion, and the cold realization that Kyo was suffering too. There was no time to fight like this, when they should be working together to fix things. But the fiery rage in his chest was too hard to dispell, and he tightened his fists.

"You're right," Kyo said quietly, staring at the ground. He spoke to Yuki, but the distance reflected in his eyes told a different story, as if he were admitting his self-centeredness to someone much more important. And then he pushed passed Yuki, and walked off the school grounds, silent and wading through the crowd of students like a person walks through the waves.

"You're right."

----------------

I stood by the bike rack, wide-eyed, my heart beating furiously in my chest. _What's going on?_ I gripped the handle of my bike, which I had been preparing to ride. Suddenly there had been an interest in two boys speaking loudly to each other, and coming close to blows. As soon as I turned around I had recognized him; Yuki, and the boy with the orange hair. His face, now up close, was far worse than I had imagined, and I felt a deep ache that I couldn't explain, a pain in my chest that went so deep that it almost choked me. The sight of the boy's face sent tears to my eyes, and it felt as though my body were pushing me towards him. It scared me.

They had been talking quietly at first, and then suddenly Yuki, who seemed calm and in control, whispered something to the boy which made him snap. The sight of him was in itself terrifying; his eyes were wide, and furious. He looked crazy, like he hadn't slept for days. My brow creased with concern as I realized it was probably true. And then, he had grabbed Yuki's shirt, snarled in his face and threw him against a wall, following by the means of the shirt he had balled up in his fists. "_Yuki_!" I had yelped, unconsciously so. The whole fan club population had turned to glare at me, their black auras almost perceptible for calling him by his first name. I quickly shut my mouth, and continued to watch worrisomely as the boys fought it out. I had thoughts of interfering, but wasn't this the way boys dealt with such things? And wouldn't it hurt Yuki's pride, for a girl to come rescue him in front of all these guys?

My head felt like it was spinning as I tried to decide whether Yuki needed help or not, when suddenly the orange-haired boy let him go, stared off, and then left. And then, in my chest, was an explosion of the sort I had never felt before; I needed to see him. The boy with the shadows under his eyes. With the strange coloured hair, with the walk that was broken, the soul that was torn…I needed to see him. Again. I needed to stare at him, I needed to look into his eyes and tell him…what? What did I need to tell him? My name? I had never even met him, but for some reason my body told me otherwise. I gripped the metal of the bike rack hard, my whole body trembling, watching my hand shake as I struggled to hold on, so as not to faint. I closed my eyes, my breath suddenly very audible as I tried to slow it down. _What's going on_? I asked myself, yet again, and as expected my mind was no help at all.

I pulled my bike from its rack, stumbling and probably looking very skittish. I glanced over quickly at where Yuki-kun stood, and received a glance from him, as well. I felt my pulse quicken, and he gave me a sad, almost conciliatory half-smile, as if he knew what was happening in my mind. I smiled back, or at least tried to smile back, and he held my gaze for a few seconds before turning around and walking away. And then I decided to run away before the Yuki Prince fan club decided they would take action.

…_who is he?_

_------------_

"So, are we riding our bikes home tonight?" Uo asked excitedly from my side. We had all found out too soon that walking home too long, and so we were forced to find some other way to get home, and bikes were the only thing we could afford. Luckily Hanajima's little brother had a few bikes that they kept at their house that he never used anyway, since he mostly stayed inside (doing whatever it was that he did…looming in the shadows and stuff.) Hana had decided that she would walk home, since she considered herself a lot less athletic than the rest of us.

"Sounds good!" I said, turning around to face her with a smile, getting a strange feeling that somewhere, someone was sending me creepy vibes…I brushed it off, picking up my books from my desk and heading out the doors with my friends.

It really was a nice day for a bike ride. It was really sunny outside and everyone seemed to be milling around the parks, people walking together hand in hand or friends enjoying the sun, which was shining down with a considerably nice amount of warmth. And then I realised, a little too late, that Uo had been yelling at me distantly to pay attention to where I was going.

"Ah!" I exclaimed, jolting back to reality and grabbing my handlebars, the bike still a little shaky. I looked back over at Uo apologetically, and she looked very frustrated, and probably would have scolded me badly if she had been close enough to.

"Hey there, having problems with your bike?" A boy asked at my side. I looked over, curious, in the back of my mind hoping it was _him_, and found an old man with the voice of a boy jogging beside me.

"Oh, ah, no that's alright, thank you." I said in practically all one breath, feeling a little bit embarrassed. I promptly forced the memory of today somewhere deep in my mind…but even that couldn't erase the feeling in my heart. I shook my head hard. Forget it. The boy/old man laughed, his face changing beautifully, and finally I saw my mistake, and felt the blush rush up into my cheeks. He had white hair, but at the ends there was a bit of black, and he was clearly my age.

"My name's Hatsuharu." he said, smiling at me with great enjoyment. "I go to your school," he added helpfully when I didn't answer, staring at him with awe. His beauty, quite frankly, blocked out all other processes of my mind.

"Nice to meet you!" I said cheerfully. "My name's Tohru." I tried trying to concentrate on him while staying in control of my bike. As oji-san taught me, driving is serious business.

"Tohru," Haru said, as if he were well acquainted with the name. He smiled, looking back up at me. "Yup, I can see why the Princess liked you so much. Although why you posed such a competition between me, I'll never know…" He frowned, trailing off into his own thoughts.

"Uh…" I was definitely lost. "Princess? And I didn't know you and I were in a competition, I…" I broke off when Haru broke out into laughter, making me even more puzzled than before by this strange new comer.

"Hey, don't sweat it." he said companionably, which confused me, but nothing he said could prepare me for what was coming next, and which was said quite casually, "I was wondering; do you dance better than you ride your bike?"

"HUH?" I exclaimed, my whole nervous system exploding into one big twitch and sending me of course in a very unsafe manner. Even though I couldn't see her, I had a feeling Uo-chan's eyes were boring into my back.

"Yeah, you're right, I guess that's a little bit too corny." he amended, running his hand through his white hair as he thought, his brow pulling down slightly. "Well, let me put it this way; do you want to go to the masked ball with me?"

"But I, uh, I mean you, well," I stuttered, my mind speeding faster than the cars dangerously close beside me. "Not to be rude, but we just, um, met." I said nervously, trying my best to be polite through the shock.

"So?" Haru said, looking at me with a cocked eyebrow, his expression saying, _That never stopped me before. _

"Um," I said quietly and in a surprisingly small voice, my mouth slack-jawed as I stared at him in disbelief. He continued to amaze me every second he spoke. He was looking at me expectantly, his eyes forceful. And then I hit into a tree.

I would have gone flying, but Haru had been right beside me, and had interfered with my fall, intercepting my fall and crushing me against his backpack that he had slung in front of him, as if in protection from me crushing him. It was a very awkward situation, as I was smooshed between Hatsuharu, his bag and the tree. There was a silence as he stared at me in the eyes, which wasn't very difficult, since our faces were so close. I was too shocked at this whole turn of events to even be startled, or embarrassed. I just stared back, eyes wide.

"You owe me a dance," Haru said, all business. "I saved your life. That has to get me something."

"I guess so." I said, not even believing my own words.

"So…yes?" Haru asked anxiously, a hint of excitement edging his words.

"Umm..uh, yes?" I said, dazed. He grinned. Why was that a question?

"Alright, then. I'll be seeing you around." Haru said, placing me back on my feet and waving as he walked away. Mid-step he turned around and pointed.

"And don't ride your bike anymore! I won't always be around to heroically save you!" And then he jogged off.

I stood in the middle of the side walk, staring after him with what was probably a stupid expression on my face, with my bike crushed in front of me.

There was no way he was real.

But I had an ominous feeling that a very tall, blonde girl behind me with her fists at her side and fiery anger in her eyes was.


	8. Chapter 8

Hana strolled down the street in her long black dress which stuck nicely to her form, her long black locks trailing down her back and her nail polish shifting well into her attire. She seemed like the very representation of a beautiful dark goddess of some sort, although she would not realize this herself, being lost in her thoughts as she was.

_He's changed_, she thought, the words reverberating through her mind. And it was true enough. Kyo was not the same. Ever since that night when he had appeared on Tohru's doorstep he hadn't been the same. In his attitude, expression and even his waves. Nothing was the same with him anymore. He no longer snapped at people, nor fought, leaving the exception today of course. And Hana had the strange feeling that things seemed to be moving into place all of a sudden.

She twirled a strand of her long black hair between her fingers as she continued to walk, slowly. Tohru didn't remember him. Whatever had happened that night, Tohru's memories had been somehow altered. She considered the fact that it had hurt both of them deeply and possibly in self-defence Tohru has suppressed all distressing memories of that night. But it seemed to be something more than that. The way Kyo gazed at her when she wasn't looking…his eyes full of desire, of yearning to speak to her; but as soon as she turned he disappeared. His waves flared with pain and then numbness. He cut himself off very quickly from the world.

A thought that bothered her recently was what had happened between them. Of course she wasn't about to take in her injured friend without asking for some type of an explanation from Kyo. And he had given her one...somewhat. She closed her eyes slightly, remembering.

_It was raining. Hanajima loved the atmosphere that rain created; grim, gloomy, but also kind of peaceful, the rain hitting against the windows, safe from wet weather. She smiled softly, her black eyes shrouding the rest of her face, and took a sip of her tea. Any minute now Tohru should be arriving, and they had a surprise for her. The new house. Hanajima smiled slightly, which was for her something very excited, as she thought of how happy her friend would be. A house of her very own. Arisa was at the moment running around the house and making sure everything was ready for when Tohru got here. Hanajima practically hummed in tune with all the excited waves emanating all over the house. _

_But then suddenly, in the back of her mind, as if something were pushing against it, she could feel another kind of wave, something more disastrous then she had felt in a long time. Quickly she stood up, her black dress twirling around her like a spiralling ribbon, and she ran out to the front room, waiting. Outside the window she could see a figure walking through the rain toward the house, following the muddy path and trudging through it slowly. Hopelessness emanated from it and also…emptiness. It confused her; nothing could feel two precise things at once! But then she noticed the dark figure was carrying someone, a second figure, in his arms. _

Who is it?_ she wondered, her eyes uncharacteristically wide and her face more pale than usual because deep down she knew the answer. She had felt it as soon as the presence had registered in her mind. Kyo. And there was no doubt as to whom was being carried. She stood frozen in shock and it seemed like a millennia until the dark figure, Kyo, had reached the porch. Slowly, and with a shaky hand, Hanajima opened the door, leaving her time to perceive every detail of the scene in front of her. _

_Pain, sorrow, guilt, regret, anger—all of these exploded and screamed in Kyo's subdued eyes. It was with great difficulty that she tore her gaze from these emotions; they seemed to swallow her up. And they seemed to want desperately to explain, even though he knew he couldn't. He clung on to her tightly, as if clutching her would keep her safe, but for some unexplainable reason kept her a few inches away from his chest, as if afraid to let her touch him. _

"_Take her." Kyo said shortly. Hana noticed things about him; his bruised face, his bleeding cuts, and the sound of his voice, on the brink of hysteria, a betrayal to his seemingly calm and numb expressions. "She hurt herself when Akito came to visit the Sohma house." What he said next, even he couldn't stop the look of agony from spreading out across his face. "Don't let her talk to me. Being near me is dangerous. I can't risk that. Not again." _

"_Kyo," Hana's voice sounded shocked to her own ears, no matter how quiet. She tried to ask him what was wrong, but her voice choked and Kyo looked away painfully. He couldn't explain, not yet. So she let her gaze slip to her friend, unconscious and beautiful, as if lost in a deep sleep. _

_Tohru hung from Kyo's arms, raindrops dripping down her light hair as if sorrow could drop from the sky. Her body looked frail, and her skin was bruised at certain places; Hana took this all in with now calm eyes, even though inside her mind was whirling. Her own hands touched Tohru's arms, and Kyo's eyes flashed to hers defensively, like a wild animal protecting its territory. But after the initial reaction he closed his eyes tightly, fighting back whatever instinct pushed him on, and handed her over, slipping her into Hana's arms. Before her friend held her completely, Kyo placed his hands on the sides of her face, raindrops dripping from his hair, his nose, and he kissed her forehead gently while whispering something. Then he let her go. _

_From the ground Hana looked up from under her mat of dark hair, her eyes questioning, pleading for some kind of answer. "She fell." was all he could say, his voice harsh and husky, as if he had been screaming all throughout the night. And then he left, with no more of an answer, disappearing into the black, stormy night, as if it could swallow him up into its dark oblivion. _

Hana's eyes opened slowly, feeling her heart becoming heavy in her chest. Something more than the obvious had happened that night. She had contemplated the thought that Kyo had hurt her in some way, possibly the bad nature that most boys showed. But her common sense had thrown away that thought, and she realized that it had been borne not by her knowledge on Kyo, but her worry for her friend. Kyo had said that Akito, the head of the Sohma family, had come to visit, and that she had fallen. True enough, she had looked as though she had been thrown around quite a bit, and anyone could tell she had been through an unaccountable amount of pain. But there was something in Kyo's eyes, in the way he looked away from her as he spoke, as if something burned behind the misery. Her mind desperately grasped for some kind of explanation, but she knew that the only people who could figure it out where the Sohmas…and Tohru.

Which brought on further complications. Tohru seemed to not recognize any of them. Hana had listened to Kyo well enough, and had kept Tohru away from him. This task had proved itself surprisingly easy, as she never even noticed him at all, and he made no advances, always seeming to blend into the silent shadows, an empty presence in both the waves and reality. Hana's brow creased ever so slightly as she walked passed benches under cherry blossom trees, nearing a house district. She had tried to bring up Kyo today in a conversation, but Tohru had shown no recognition at all. Whatever had happened, it was grave enough for her to lose her memories, and that worried her, very much. And although she didn't know what had happened, the Sohmas waves were all heart broken, as if something had been torn from each of them, something vital. _I must do something, _she thought, her delicate fingers grasping into fists. _Would it be wiser to let things work out themselves, or help fix it now? _

As she stood thinking, her dark hair veiling her face, she heard a friendly voice calling. "Hanajima-san!" he called. She looked up from under her lashes, and perceived a man in a traditional robe walking toward her, grinning widely.

"Gooday, Shishou-san." she said formally, and smiled politely back, with a hint of her own happiness in the mix. She couldn't help but think of how handsome he was…Her smile deepened, her black eyes revealing even more. He stopped as he stood near her, smiling only slightly now as he gazed at her warmly, as he would an old friend.

"I trust you're doing well?" he asked curiously, motioning to her present state, being walking home. "You seem to have a lot on your mind." he said, much less formally. For some reason, it wasn't much of a concern to see his eyes full of worry.

"I've had a lot to think about." she said in explanation, a little less formally, letting him know at least a bit of how she felt. It seemed to, for now, quell his worries. "And you," she asked, staring into his eyes. "How are you?"

It was only until now that she noticed his pale complexion, and the rather slouched way he stood. He needed rest; that much was clear. Shishou thought of lying, saying that he was fine, just a little tired, but for some reason he felt that Hana could see right through him, that she knew his deepest feelings just by looking at him. He knew that if he lied, she would smile and move on, but he held a higher respect for her than that, and knew he had to tell the truth.

"I'm not well." he admitted. Hana knew that it was probably Kyo. So then, it was true. Kyo was unwell. Nothing else could bother him so much. "He was…different for a while, but now its back to as it was before." was all he said, and Hanajima saw all the pain and even guilt that was in him as he said those words. He seemed to blame himself for the pain that Kyo was going through, for the way he had changed. But still, she did not fully understand what was happening.

They continued their discussion, speaking of things such as his dojo, new recipes they had learnt, books they had read.

"Would you like to come in for tea?" he asked politely, smiling even though he looked like a mess.

"I would love something warm to drink," she said, imagining a hot cup in her hands. She had enough time to spend, and not much homework. And she had quite a few questions about Kyo; now was the perfect time to ask them. As they headed toward his house, she added, laughing slightly, "As long as you aren't reading. I've heard you tend to mess up your cooking while multitasking." Shishou's face flushed considerably. Yes, she would ask him what was going on with their family and what had happened with Tohru. Something shifted in her dark eyes, determination, perhaps, and she walked onwards, contemplative.

----------------------------

Kyo struck out, hard. His hand hit against the padded piece he had attached to the tree outside in the forest, near the dojo, for his training. The air around him smelled fresh, and not far away there was a slow river that reflected thousands of shining diamonds from the sun, but all Kyo could sense was anger and the blood pulsing through his veins. He struck out viciously, fast and hard, every strike resounding with a loud _smack_ throughout the forest.

His thoughts were nowhere but in front of him, focused, determined. The only real way to lose himself, to escape his thoughts was not sleep, or finding that numb place in his mind. It was fighting. It was letting himself go to complete and total emotion annihilation, going into that trance where he was left with nothing more than his purpose to hit the freakin' pads as hard as possible, so hard that his knuckles turned red and sore. But he didn't care. He bandaged them loosely and quickly, his mind totally elsewhere. And whenever his mind would stray, his heart would clench and a single thought would quickly run through his mind, as if mocking him and trying to run away so not to be caught, _Tohru_.

He would howl and throw himself once again into the never-ending pummelling, with his short breaths ensuing. But no matter how he tried to escape it, how fast he ran or how hard he pushed his body, he couldn't stop the recurring destinations those thoughts of her lead to, as if they were creeping, slowly, into his mind, under his skin, in his blood…grabbing hold of his thoughts, his body, his mind, holding him tight and leaving him so empty he didn't know whether he would scream or clutch his chest and fall. _I was going to leave her_, the judging, terrible thought echoed; _I was going to leave her alone. _His thoughts strayed to how everything seemed to end up being his fault; his mother's death, Tohru's memory loss…everyone's misery. It was self-centered, yes, and self-pity, he knew, and it was pathetic. But it was also the truth. He supposed that it was how you dealt with it that made it pitiful or not. _And I'm sure as hell not going to mope about it like some idiot_, he thought angrily to himself, punching the pad even harder. But a small voice in his mind said, _Aren't you already?_

He let out a ferocious kick and the hand-made practicing pad split in two, broken. He breathed heavily, his chest heaving from the demands he had made of his body, his heart raging. He plopped himself down on the ground, holding his head in his hands. _What's going on?_ he asked himself, his thoughts whirling dangerously with anger. And mixed into that hurricane of dangerous thoughts, there was guilt. Frustrated, weeping guilt that was screaming louder than anything else in his mind.

"Still out here training, I see." said a deep, observant voice. Shishou walked toward Kyo, pretending to wander but keeping his eyes on the boy the entire time. He had somewhat sensed his master's presence, through all the pain. Now he could feel that people had auras, and he could sense the zodiac members especially well. This hadn't come naturally to him; he had honed his skills. Ever since…that time…with Tohru, he had pushed himself to his limits. He had to become stronger. If he had been able to sense the zodiac members more strongly, he would have been able to watch out for Tohru better. If he had sensed Akito coming, if he had been faster, stronger---

"How are you keeping up?" Shishou asked, interrupting his thoughts. Once again Kyo was brought back to the real world; the snapping of the forest trees in the wind, the river downhill…the sun against his skin. Even with all these things, nothing felt real. Everything was anger. Even Shishou's eyes, watching him closely.

Instead of answering, Kyo groaned, his face buried in his hands. His face was burning up, and he felt a fever flowing through his blood, but he didn't want it to show. He didn't want Shishou to worry, not as he had before. This was something he could face, alone. He wouldn't get anybody else mixed up in his misery. But that damn rat was getting much too edgy. _He has to mess off, before I break his face_, Kyo thought angrily.

"Ah, the groan of a million words." Shishou said grandly, teasingly sarcastic. "Come on, Kyo, I deserve a little bit more of an explanation than that. You just destroyed our practice mat, our only practice mat for that matter, in the entire forest location. Explain yourself." Kyo's hands fell down to his side, and he looked distant, his face burning red, but at the same time, pale.

"I can't talk about it." he said. Shishou tried to reach out to him, outstretching his hand to Kyo's shoulder.

"Kyo, I can help. Running away like this isn't the answer."

"I said I don't want anything to do with this, alright!" Kyo yelled, shifting away from his master. Shishou looked at him distantly, his face serious as if etched in stone.

"Just think about what you're losing." he said, and then walked off. Kyo watched him go angrily, his jaw tight and his face almost set in a snarl, and as soon as he felt Shishou was gone he screamed angrily, hitting the tree nearest him. He felt pain shoot up his arm, but he pulled his hand away without a moment's notice, stalking around the clearing angrily.

"I'm losing her." he said, realization hitting him hard. "Not again. Never again." he muttered quietly, lashing out at the broken pad, once again.

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The sun shone down, illuminating the school grounds and the students milling about as they observed the flowers lining in rows, or walked hand in hand. I smiled happily, eating my lunch with Uo, Hana and Yuki, who had decided to join us, a blanket spread out on the ground as a picnic. I had prepared the food, and Uo had brought her very own juice that she had made herself.

"It's very good!" I exclaimed after having tried it. She rolled her eyes and brushed it off by saying,

"Yeah, whatever." but I could see the faint blush coloring her cheeks. She was dressed in a dress designed with flowers on it, looking ever the model.

"No, really, it's very enjoyable." Hana said between her food, her mouth stuffed. She always seemed to enjoy food so much, it was a wonder she never got fat…

"I agree." Yuki said, nodding, his silver hair shining in the light. I smiled companionably at him. At first I had thought him a beautiful prince of the school, but now I was coming to look at him more and more as a good friend. Maybe we had been family in a past life?

"Hello, ladies." said a voice from behind me. I turned around to meet with Haru's face in mine, literally. His nose was almost touching mine. I yelped quietly and jumped away a few centimetres, my heart pounding hard through my chest. He looked pointedly at Yuki but didn't amend by saying, "and Yuki," but instead moved on, which made Yuki's expression turn from pleasant to very irritated. My thoughts were whirling, and I tried to compose myself but only began stuttering once again. He laughed full-out, to the astonishment of Uo and Hana, who looked at him quizzically.

"Sorry, didn't mean to scare you." he apologized, suddenly dazzling. He was like…a prince! Gallant, almost…for some reason, though, my mind seemed to get all confused when I associated the word "gallant" with "Haru"…as if it were funny or something. Yuki growned and muttered something that sounded like, "_Oh, damn it all_…"

"Who're you?" Uo asked bluntly. He smiled.

"I'm Haru. Nice to meet you. But of course, princess here already knows me. We were lovers in a past life," he added, which brought much confusion. Princess? Was Yuki the princess he was talking about? I looked questioningly at Yuki, but his eyes were closed as he tried to calm down his irritation. Gee, I wonder why Haru made him so frustrated?

"Haru?" Uo repeated, dumbfounded. "Tohru, you're actually going to a dance with this guy?" she asked, pointing toward him with a jerk of her thumb. I was stupefied.

"You're actually REAL?" I exclaimed. I had thought it had all been an illusion, something I had made up when I fell off my bike and hit my head. He shrugged.

"Yup," I frowned, and as I puzzled over that, Haru grabbed me by the waist and in one swift motion pulled me up to my feet.

"E-Excuse me, but I don't think you should do that!" I said shrilly.

"Hey, don't worry about it. Just teachin' you how to dance." Haru said, sweeping me into his arms and starting to dance. He looked strangely contempt, as if happy with himself for confusing me.

"What's his deal?" Uo asked Hana, her sandwich still suspended mid-air as she watched us twirl around.

"Dunno." Hana shrugged, and continued eating, unperturbed by the sudden interruption of our lunch by the mysterious boy. Suddenly another boy sat down on our picnic area.

"Hi!" he exclaimed happily, sucking on a lollipop and watching with widened eyes the spectacle before them all. "Hey, Yuki. What's up?" Yuki nodded in his direction.

"Momiji," he said in greeting. "I _was_ eating my lunch," he trailed off, shaking his head.

Uo raised an eyebrow at the newest intruder, too overwhelmed by what was going on already to be surprised by him. He looked like a little kid. Finally Haru stopped doing the tango with me, at which I was failing miserably at, (or at least I think it was the tango,) and smiled broadly to the boy.

"Hey, Momiji!" he greeted him with a wave.

"Hi," he said, looking at me. "I'm Momiji, and you must be Tohru! Nice to meet you again," he said, getting up and offering his hand. Haru glared at him seriously for a few seconds and Momiji seemed to edit something in his mind and he repeated, "Nice to meet you for the first time, I meant!"

"Nice to meet you too!" I said, out of breath. I shook his hand, which he shook back vigorously.

"So you're practicing dancing with Haru here?" Momiji asked politely. I nodded.

"Yup, although I'm not that good." I said.

"Wow," Momiji said, his expression looking completely amazed. "You're actually going to dance with Haru. Tohru…with Haru?" He looked confused for a second, and seemed to ponder, but moved on. "Oh well, this will be exciting!"

"Yeah," I agreed, and we all began laughing. I turned over to look at Haru, to note his expression, and suddenly I felt fear grip my heart, like an iron clasp. Haru's expression, serious, for some reason brought something back to my mind…

"_Haru_?" I gasped out, my eyes widening. _Black Haru, Hatsuharu fighting Yuki, Haru at the summer house---_

"Tohru!" Yuki called out, alarmed, his voice wavering. Haru caught me as I began to fall down, clutching my head. I looked up at him, seeing his face but not really seeing it as memories flashed before my eyes, clouding my vision of him with memories of him.

"Haru, I _can't_ go to the dance with you," I said, frowning. "No, Haru, what about Rin? You should ask her, and---" then suddenly it all stopped. I looked at the expression of those around me, and for once everybody looked stunned. Hana had even dropped her food. Haru looked concerned, and Uo looked like she was going to faint from worry.

"I..I don't know what I was saying," I said. "Sorry, it must be the aftershock of hitting my head. Sometimes I remember things that never really happened." I looked up at Haru apologetically. His grave, dark eyes seemed to bore into mine, but finally he looked away.

"Yeah, I suppose you do." he said, suddenly subdued, different from his excited self just moments before. "Maybe that's for the best." Nobody really seemed to understand his cryptic phrases, but he sat down and ate lunch with us anyway. I noticed, as we ate, a glance that Haru and Yuki exchanged. It spoke of much. It spoke of danger. I let my mind wander on it, but was soon pulled into a discussion with my friends, somewhat distracted. But one thing I knew—there was something else going on here.

-----------------------

A black-clad figure stood underneath the cover of the iron fence that surrounded a part of the school grounds, in the shadows, his dark eyes flashing as he watched them from a distance. His face was barely composed as his jaw tightened from anger. He had intended to come to the school and blend in, but his dark clothes and anger demeanour set him apart from every student there. He took his cellphone out of his pockets that stuck tightly to his legs, flipping it open and speed dialing.

"Hatori, I need your assistance." he stressed the last word with his infuriated, serpentine voice and snapped the phone shut, his eyes narrowing to slits and his jaw clenched, almost as if he were going to hiss. "This is going to end."

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A/N: Hey there! *waves* Thanks a lot for reading my story, and especially thanks for all the nice words you reviewers sent me :) I appreciate it. It's what makes writing fanfictions worth while, knowing people enjoy it. So thanks!


	9. Chapter 9

_It all started with a cat. __A few minutes after school was over I found him. I remember it was exactly then because_ _I had stayed late doing activities with Uo and Hana, planning decorations for the ball that Momiji had signed us up for with him. But all that seems like a daze compared to the memories of being with him, as if everything else before and after that was just a blur in time. _

_----------_

It was a calm evening after school, shadows appearing underneath the trees and a cool breeze blowing through my hair. The only sound that could be heard on the school grounds was the tapping of my shoes against the pavement as I slowly wandered home, my briefcase-like bag swinging in my grip. My mind whirled with anticipation for the ball; the decorations would be so beautiful!

"I think the ball is going to be a success!" I said, throwing my fist into the air enthusiastically. There was a large group of students preparing everything and we had gotten some of the smaller jobs. Hana had prepared the snacks and Uo, Momiji and I were helping with the decorations. Not planning them, of course, but just helping add little things. I continued walking when suddenly I was stopped short in my tracks. A little kitten was lying curled up in a ball, looking up at me with dark, round, sad eyes. I felt my heart literally break, and I picked him up immediately.

"Oh my gosh!!! You poor thing! What are you doing here?" And then suddenly I noticed another one, coming from around the corner, and looking at me in the same way.

"Kitty-sans, what are you doing here? And why do you look so sad?" I picked that one up too, and then around the corner I found another one; soon I had about six cats in my arms, all of them perching comfortably around my shoulders.

They all seemed to be leading somewhere; and soon, disoriented and not really knowing how I got there, I found myself on the roof of the school. Now there were cats all over me; on my head, around my shoulders and everywhere on my arms. But as soon as we got to the top, they all leapt down, landing on their four feet and scampered away to a boy who was sitting slouched over on the far side of the roof. There were about a dozen cats surrounding him, and he didn't even seem to notice them.

My heart froze as I noticed his hair; orange. I felt the palms of my hands become sweaty (why was I so nervous?) and I walked over to him. As soon as I saw his face, I began to wonder if he was even awake. His shoulders were slumped, and by his bruised face and bloody lip I could tell he had been in a fight. Concerned, I knelt down beside him and asked,

"Are you alright?"

Something flickered in his eyes, and his fingers twitched. He seemed to be very, very deep in his thoughts and I was worried that if I disturbed him he would wake up in shock. But anything seemed to be better than the state he was in; he needed to get his wounds cleaned up. Lightly, I put my hand on his shoulder.

"Kyo," Until then I hadn't realized that he had never told me his name, and yet I knew it. But the name faded as quickly as it had come, and soon I had forgotten his name entirely.

He frowned slightly, but still didn't move from his frozen position. I slipped my hand back to my side and watched him closely, waiting for some sign of awakening. He blinked a few times, then groaned, as if being woken up by an annoying alarm clock and wanting to keep sleeping; then he ran a hand through his hair, scowling. He noticed the cats before he even noticed me; they were clambering all over him, mewing sympathetically, and he brushed them away softly, as if saying, _Thanks, you're cute, but now get lost._

Then, as if by accident, his eyes met mine. They widened and he actually looked afraid for a second, but then calmed himself and suddenly was back to scowling.

"Uh, sorry—did I surprise you? I just found all these cats, and then you looked hurt, so I thought I'd help." I felt embarrassed at my rushed explanation, but I hoped it would be enough for him. He sat a little straighter now, and silently cleaned off the blood on his face.

"It's alright, you didn't do anything wrong." he grumbled, patching himself up. In a strange way, he reminded me of a cat hiding to lick its wounds.

There was a silence as he fixed himself up, and I sat there, fretting over what to say next. I wasn't sure if I was supposed to get up and leave or help him. I peeked over innocently at the job he was doing at fixing his wounds—which wasn't very good at all. I frowned and reached out to help him as his fingers fumbled and twisted in the bandage he was trying to wrap his arm with. Our fingers brushed as I helped him, and I felt a shock, as if touching his fingers was something alarming. My heart started pounding in my chest, but I ignored it and also ignored the look he had given me; it was as if his eyes were boring into mine, following my every move. But then, after a few seconds he seemed to relax and become less tense; I wondered if he thought I was going to worsen his wounds. As I bandaged his other arm, I found a cut that was particularly deep, and was bleeding; I paused, concerned.

"He had a knife." he said in explanation. The sound of his voice shocked me; he hadn't talked for a few minutes, subdued into his own world. I didn't think he was going to talk at all—he seemed the stubborn type that just let you help them and then left quickly. I wouldn't have minded that, actually, but to see that he was going to talk made me strangely happy.

"Why were you in a fight with someone who had a knife?" I asked. It seemed really dangerous, and I was concerned, but he seemed not to care. He shrugged, proving my point.

"I challenged him to a fight, and he cheated." he rubbed his arm tenderly. "I'll never let him live that down…" there seemed to be a fire burning in his eyes, matching the hair on his head.

"Do you always fight?" I asked, still in wonder that I was able to talk about it so casually with him. He looked over at me from the side.

"Yeah, I do. It's the only thing that really makes me feel alive these days." That didn't sound too healthy, but I stayed quiet; instead he looked out at the school grounds. It felt oddly comfortable, sitting up on the rooftop, beside him. As if the silence was comfortable, not awkward as it would be with strangers.

"Who was it that you fought?" I asked. I didn't know many people in gangs, although Uo could name quite a few, probably. Kyo seemed to read my thoughts and shook his head.

"He's not in a gang. His name is Takeshi, and he's a part of my family." Kyo paused, probably editing a few things. "He insulted me, and I got angry. So I challenged him." He ground his teeth, his jaw clenched. "Obviously, I lost." he closed his eyes, subduing his anger. When he had calmed down, he opened them again.

"I've made a lot of mistakes, I know." he said, clasping his hands over his knees. "I've screwed up so much. But even so, I think I can leave that all behind me; start again." he said. I was a bit amazed at how getting into fights and beaten up was a new start for him. But there seemed to be some improvement.

"I'm glad you're finding your way." I said, smiling. He glanced over at me, and to my surprise, smiled too.

"Yeah, I figured you would be." he turned away again, and it seemed as if he caught his grin; it faded away slowly, like a vague mirage drifting away before my eyes. Suddenly a question came to my mind.

"Were we friends?" He looked over, that alarmed look in his eyes that he had whenever I spoke to him. He looked down and fiddled with a piece of loose string on his shirt.

"Yeah, we were." he replied.

"I knew it!" I exclaimed, leaning in toward him excitedly. I could feel my eyes widen and my fingers tighten into excited fists. "Ever since I saw you, I knew that we had known each other. I just…well, I felt it! Now that we've met again, we can be friends just like before!" I was confused when his reaction wasn't the same as mine. He didn't say anything, and I frowned, watching as his eyes remained dead. He shifted his position, and then looked over at me.

"We were friends." his eyes drifted off, retreating into his mind once again. Then he shut them tightly, and shook his hair in a frustrated fashion. "Look, I can't be around you a lot for reasons I can't say, but if…" he took a breath, as if it were painful, as if the words stuck in his throat were scraping their way down. "If you ever need help, just ask."

"Help?" I asked, confused. I wondered why we couldn't be friends like before.

"Help." he nodded, confirming it, and I knew it to be true.

"Thank you." My words seemed to stumble. I was grateful for his sincere desire to help me, although from what, the answer certainly could not be found in his eyes. I decided if I ever needed his help, I would know when to ask him. We sat there in silence again, watching the sun set, the sky turning a soft orange, the light dimming down over the horizon. Something seemed to be on his mind, as he shifted around on his spot unnervingly. I gave him a questioning glance, and he looked over at me quickly, his eyes intense and shockingly beautiful, as if they would swallow me up.

"Tohru," he said. "Do you remember me?" I could almost feel his need to reach out and touch my hand, how much he was holding back.

It surprised me, and quite frankly, it scared me—scared me because I felt exactly the same way. But I couldn't remember anything. The first thing I remember about him was seeing him outside, and meeting his glance—everything before that was gone. But he seemed to cling on to those memories, seemed to thrive on them, and yet I couldn't even remember one. Something that was so important to him, I couldn't even remember. The pain of it brought tears to my eyes. It was a deep ache in my chest, knowing that he held on so dearly to those memories, and to me they were lost.

"No." I said, trying to choke back my tears. His eyes searched mine, as if to make sure it was true. And when he knew it was, he pulled back, sitting farther away. He seemed to be going through so much pain, and I couldn't help him. I wished then I could hear his thoughts, I wished I could remember, and most of all I wished he wouldn't look so sad! I felt the tears run down my face, and I clutched at my skirt.

"I…I'm sorry." I said, through my tears. He looked over at me, surprised. "I wish I could help you, I really do. You offered to help me, and now all I can do is watch you get hurt, because of something that happened to me, because of my incompetence…" I shuddered, feeling my sadness rack through my body. I looked up at him, full in the face.

"But please, know that I'll do what I can to help you. I know we were friends, and I want us to still be, but just….please, take better care of yourself." He still watched me with widened eyes, as if in awe, and then suddenly he was in front of me, his hands running through my hair, his head pressing against mine.

"Stop crying, you idiot…" he said teasingly, but softly. And it felt natural, as if he had done this before. I cried but wiped my tears away, not wanting to get his shirt wet even though he kept a distance between us. And then he pushed me back lightly, so I could see his eyes. His face was very serious; grave almost. He leaned in and I felt his lips brush my forehead and heard him say in a quiet voice,

"I just want you to be safe. That's all I've ever wanted." And then he stood up and began walking away, leaving me sitting on the ground, watching his shadow.

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_It was the first time in __that new life that I had met him. And it was also at that moment that I realised I had feelings for him. It took time, but it was then that it started to bloom._

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_A/N: I hope you enjoyed this chapter :) I know I did. Finally!!! But believe me, everything is going to get very very intense after this chapter, and I'll give you a little hint; it involves Haru/Rin, divisions amongst the zodiac, and an evil-mastermind named Akito...as well as memories coming and fading all very quickly. And of course the angsty tension...:) Hope you're excited, and thanks for reading, supporting and reviewing! It's a pleasure to write for you guys._


	10. Chapter 10

Kyo's fingers brushed endlessly against the now-crumpled paper, worn from his incessant grip on it. How could such an offer come at a time like this, when everything seemed to be looking up? _I guess that's how things work. Give you something great than take away just as much_, he thought angrily, his eyes darkening. His hand balled up in a fist, scrunching the paper once again. _But why now?_

It was an offer, an offer to not only get away from this life but to escape captivity, for a while longer at least. He could live his life for that much longer, but only if he left. If he left behind his home, his family, his friends…could he leave all that behind? But is there anything really left here for me to stay for? He wondered, quickly repressing the thought, because of course, there were still people who loved him like Shishou, possibly Kagura (even though it was strange) and he still had school. At first he thought the mere thought of having nothing left was selfish, childish; but then it occurred to him that here he may not have a future. Soon he would age, he would become an adult; it was inevitable. He could take over from Shishou at the dojo, train to become a sensei and eventually own the dojo; he could imagine the pride in his masters eyes as he looked at him teaching, he---

Kyo took a sharp intake of breath, closing his eyes and rubbing his temples harshly. He had to stop thinking about the future that way. He knew there was nothing left there, nothing but emptiness. Shishou could never look at him that way, and he could never take over the dojo. If he tried, it would only cause him and others more pain than before—to drop his dreams when they weren't even completed, to have a glimpse of the future he might have, making it almost tangible, almost in his reach; he couldn't do that to himself. It was better not try and grasp at what he knew would be ripped away from him as soon as he was near true happiness.

He opened his eyes and suddenly they looked innocent, unguarded, and profoundly _sad_. Thoughts of Tohru flashed against his mind, the last time they had met; he wondered if she would even remember that meeting on the roof. The possibilities were she would forget almost every encounter with him they had had so far. At first, when Yuki had told him that Tohru could remember, that he had spoken to her and there had been recognition in her eyes, he had doubted him. But after he had seen proof, he had been unbelievably happy, he had felt that hope, that joy in his chest rise up; he had felt like a man who had been deprived of breath and suddenly found he was breathing again, who had found he was slowly coming back to life.

It was true; she could remember certain things. But whether those flashes of memory would be permanent, whether should would remember the last thing they had said to each other…how could he live like this? Forgetting him, constantly, every declaration of love just as similar to the last, every progress erased…there was nothing else but fragments in her mind. To live through that would be to break down piece by piece.

There was nothing in his future here but possible pain. Pain at finally being with Tohru, feeling the joy he's always dreamed of and knowing she feels it too—and then having her ripped away from his grip, watching her change from a distance (because it was definite, erasing her memory like that…it changed her as a person, even if she hadn't noticed) walking closer and closer to that damn dark future, losing his family, losing the sky, the sun, _goddamn_, even the _smell_ of the _freakin' air_…

He couldn't do it. He just couldn't.

He sat up on his bed, opening the paper back up and reading it again.

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I was visiting around a temple that was currently hosting a small festival, celebrating the fall. People crowded the streets, hustling and bustling and wearing the dimming colors that tended to arrive with the colder weather. Lanterns hung in the streets attached to cords, and little arts and crafts could be found everywhere, as well as the hot steam of food and vendors nearby. Everything felt so alive; I loved being where other people were, just gazing and trying to absorb as much as possible.

I traveled along the shelves, staring at the little statues all lined up together. Strangely it reminded me of something, but I couldn't quite put my finger on it. They were of little tiny animals, statues made of clay and some painted rocks, and they were all really cute. The zodiac animals, all lined up. My eyes drifted curiously over to a sign that hung next to them, with a signature of _S.S_ and a small face of an almost over-excited happy face drawn quickly with an ink pen. Perhaps this mysterious person was a growing artist? My mind whirled with all the possibilities of this secret person, imagining a man of great talent who was kept hidden from the world.

My mind whirled with anticipation, and I took a second to look around me, to try and spot someone familiar. Mostly everyone was there with someone else, holding hands, lovers talking excitedly to each other, faces flushed and fingers intertwined. I stood there alone, feeling suddenly small and flexed my fingers carefully, not wanting to look apart. Even though I was. I felt my heart sink a little bit.

_Haru doesn't like me that way_, I thought to myself, and for the first time in days, even though I had been repeating it to myself a few times, a stray thought, I had never really confirmed it. _What about Yuki? _He was my friend, a close friend who had watched over me when I was sick…for sure, I felt blush rise to my cheeks just thinking about him, but…but what?

My brow furrowed. Why did I always feel this way? I felt like I was missing something…no. I had to stop denying it. I was missing someone, and I—I had a feeling that I had never even heard of before, something that went past love. It was like I saw that person when I closed my eyes, only a glimpse of him but he was there, like even if I didn't know who he was, I could feel it, like it was an instinct, like it was the last thing I clung onto. But…that just didn't make any sense.

I huffed out a breath of air, watching the mist rise in front of me and smiled. I knew what Mom would say. Love is something to be treasured, so stop fretting over it. I had a feeling that if I knew I loved him, I would find him.

A boy passed by, and he was selling flowers. The vendor was a small boy and he gave me such big eyes that he reminded me of Kisa and it was all I could do not to grab him in my arms and start sending out little tiny imaginary hearts all around us. I looked at all the roses, tulips and other assortments he had in his basket, all of them still fresh-looking with moisture hanging on their petals and their scent still very strong. I picked out a flower, a lily, and smelled it, smiling as the beautiful, soft scent enveloped me. I loved them so much! I paid the boy and he ran off, leaving me to observe the flowers I had gotten.

I heard the song of a bird and looked up, searching for the source. It was a really beautiful melody, and as soon as one went off, at least half a dozen others began as well, a trilling beautiful song, joyous yet short, and I felt sad to have it over. I saw the birds, flying away, dispersing around a girl about my age, flailing at them wildly and laughing, grinning widely as she ran after them, her scarf trailing behind her from her neck. And then I looked over to the boy standing next to her, his smile faint as he watched her, and I could tell he hadn't smiled for a while and this was the first time. Then he turned his head, and in my eyes time seemed to slow; people walking through the streets seemed to halt, the movement of the flying birds suspended, and his eyes met mine.

Brown. They were brown. And his mouth opened a bit, his eyes wide. He had orange hair.

Our eyes met, and suddenly time sped up again, people passing by in front of us, but our gaze never broke. It was like I was entranced. Maybe I was. Somehow I still managed to hold onto the flowers in my grip.

The boy looked away suddenly, promptly breaking our gaze. Was it just an illusion, or did I see guilt flash in his eyes? I blinked once, for the first time in a while, and noticed I couldn't move, like I was frozen in place. I looked away, also, feeling awkward. It was impolite to openly stare at people I didn't know, but there was something there—I had thought something when I saw him—but no, it was gone. I had forgotten already. I looked up again, cautiously this time, and found him looking at me. I could tell…I'm not sure how, but I could tell he wanted to look at me, but for some reason hated himself for doing so, punished himself. It was clear from the flushed look of sadness in his eyes. I looked back, trying to say everything I felt in one look.

_Why are you here?_ I asked. And the answer I received was,

_I don't know._

--------------------------

Kagura dumped her things in front of Kyo's feet.

"I heard about the letter," she said hotly, her cheeks flushed. "And I'm telling you right now I'm not going to stand for it."

Kyo looked up at her, looking mildly surprised and he wondered, almost irritated, how she had come by the information, but really he was too tired to deal with her. He fell back on his bed, deciding to ignore her.

"Kyo-kun!" she whined. "Don't do this to me!" Yeah, right. Ignoring was a great idea.

"Kagura, it's not your choice." He muttered, and closed his eyes. He heard her stomp her foot, and he could tell by the sound of it she would be wearing an indignant expression.

"But it is, Kyo, that's what you keep forgetting!" she pronounced every word sharply. "I love you, I love you so much, and you always brush me off like I'm nothing. But I swore to you that I would always be by your side, and now you think you can just move away? Leave me behind?" Her voice was rising dangerously, and all of a sudden she went very quiet, sending alarms off in Kyo's mind. He sat up very fast, opening his eyes.

"Kagura," he said cautiously, seeing his cousin's hair shadowing her face and her fists balled up. "Calm down." He worried about his room, and the things he couldn't lose.

"I'll only calm down, Kyon," she said through her teeth. "If you take me to the festival. As a date." Kyo clenched his jaw, gritting his teeth just as hard. That was how she was going to play it, then. Threaten him. Well he wasn't her bitch, no matter how tired and emotional he felt.

"Go _to hell_, Kagura," he growled, and then got up, walking out of the room. He didn't care, he would take the beating he knew was coming. He really, _truly_, did not care even if his pride was wrecked. But he got passed the door, then down the hall, and then he stopped, noticing something was wrong. He spun around on his heels, backtracking. She hadn't thrown him through the wall, she hadn't beaten his face in. So what happened?

He walked back to his room, his brow set curiously, and found her sitting on the floor against his bed, the sheets of his bed pressed against her face, and she was crying. Kyo looked at her, surprised and totally uncomprehending, and she just _kept crying_.

"Hey," he said shakily, reaching out his hand. Damn it, damn it! He said in his mind. He was never good with crying girls. It was, in a way, his weak spot. He always felt out of place and awkward, especially when he was the reason they were crying.

"Kyo," she said quietly, and the removed the blankets from her face, revealing red eyes and tears streaming down her cheeks. She looked extremely fragile, compared to the contrast of what he had imagined her looking like when she attacked him, and he felt a shock pulse through him. "Think of what you're doing. Not what you're leaving behind, or what you're losing…because obviously none of that matters to you, I get it! But please, just for yourself, please, please just come to this festival with me. You're…you're dying in here, and I feel so helpless just standing here and watching you wilt away and only understanding what I can see in your eyes," she covered her mouth, looking shocked like she hadn't planned to say that at all, like she had written down a speech and suddenly new and totally unplanned words came flowing out of her mouth. But Kyo's eyes softened, and he knelt down beside her, wanting her tears to stop, and suddenly understanding. He took her hand.

"It's alright, Kagura," he said softly. "I'll come with you." She smiled weakly, and her tears were gone almost right away. Then she jumped up to her feet, and smiled widely.

"Alright, let's be off, then!" and she raced out of his room, probably out of the house before he even put his coat on. He shook his head, feeling bewildered and looked back just once at the crumpled letter on his bed.

Maybe she had heard about the offer to move, but she had left out one important thing. His eyes drifted to the floor, feeling his chest turn heavy, and he decided not to think about it, to block it off until later. He shut his door.

* * * * * * * * *

Kagura gripped his hand tightly, making cooing noises at all the pretty things he could find—but Kyo felt distracted. He told himself to stop thinking, stop thinking about anything at all and just go with the crowd, just follow Kagura, but he still felt empty. Too much had happened for him to really feel good again. But he tried, and Kagura's smile reached beamed every time he did. It made him feel a bit better, if only a bit.

He observed her as she pointed things out to him, rummaging through different eye masks, pointing out ones that would look good on him for the ball and dropping anvils of hints. He tried to smile, not saying yes or no or anything relevant at all, just silent and approving.

He watched the way her hair swung over her shoulders, how it shone in the sunlight, and how her movements were quick, clumsy, and almost impulsive but strangely…cute. She was wearing a short dress, and excitement almost rolled off her in waves, and suddenly he considered something, something that had never came to mind; she was pretty. Really, she was, but that wasn't why he started thinking of her as nice. She _tried_. However vague that may seem, it was wholly and completely true. Every inch of her was trying for him, trying to cheer him up. She knew something was wrong, and she was putting every fibre of her being into the effort for him. He felt a ghost of a smile on his face, an empty laugh rise to his throat. People did love him, but for what? Why should the love him? He was empty, and his future was empty. But he decided to pretend, for now at least.

She dragged him along the streets, and he watched as her scarf trailed after her, slapping against his chest. Her wide eyes looked back at him, encouraging him along, and suddenly broke out into a run. He exclaimed, and was forced to run with her, and suddenly felt something in his chest. At first he thought it was the heaviness of running, but then he heard it, and it was hard to believe himself; laughing. And why shouldn't he? He was having fun, he was running, he was on a date, _he should laugh_. They both stopped, standing beside a flock of birds.

"You're smiling," she noted, her eyes sparkling as she looked up at him.

"Yeah," Kyo confirmed, feeling his face flush a bit. Kagura's laugh was almost a tinkering, and she threw her arms in the air, sending the birds flying away in a wonderful song, a song that equalled the one in his heart.

And then he saw her.

She was there, standing not too far away from him, her brown hair blowing into her face, wide eyes, beautiful eyes, her face soft, her heart almost calling out to him, and he wanted to run, run over to her and grab her in his arms and tell her he was scared, that he wanted to know if she felt it too, and please, Tohru, I miss you—and suddenly memories from their time on the rooftop, after school—suddenly it all flooded back into his mind, pain like a knife in his chest, and he wondered if she remembered, remembered the kiss he had given her, softly, on her forehead. The tears he had dried. The feelings he had revealed.

But her look was awed, as if there was a flicker of memory there, but nothing more.

Nothing more.

He felt a pained sound stick in his throat and he swallowed it, looking away, back at Kagura. She was still happily running around, and suddenly he felt disconnected from that world he had shared with her moments before. Frustration in his heart, he looked down to the ground. But something was pulling him, like a magnetic force, like something in the middle of his chest, _dragging_ his gaze upwards. He looked again, not knowing why. And she looked up, moments later. Their eyes met. Questions flowed between them, none answered.

And then he took a step forward, toward the girl that meant the world to him. He wondered if she had ever known that.

------------------

Haru left his bike leaning against a wall and ran over to the CD stand, digging through it with great interest, searching for the newest album of his favourite band. Usually he would just put them on his iPod, but it was almost a ritual for him to buy the CDs. He didn't get too many stares while he was here; most people looked like him, so he felt comfortable. Although the odd girl would stare at him—that was inevitable. _I mean, of course it is, my bike is so_ sexy, _why wouldn't they stare_? he thought.

His white hair was brushed upwards today, a black shirt sticking to his chest and a metal cross around his neck. His black arm tattoos showed under his sleeves, and he picked up a CD from a stand, his face victorious as he observed it.

He almost dropped it as he heard a crash behind him, loud and clanking. He turned sideways to look at the culprit. It seems that a girl had tripped over a trash can, and was staring in his direction with a piercing gaze. Her long black hair blew in the wind, looking like ink in solid form, and she seemed to be staring straight at—no, _through_ Haru, straight through him, her intent look almost scary.

"Rin," he breathed, amazed, feeling his heart skip a beat then race. He dropped the CD he had been holding entirely, and ran in her pursuit. She had booked it as soon as their eyes had met. _Damn she's fast_, he growled inwardly, and cursed himself for not taking his bike.

------

A/N: Hey guys! Sorry for taking so long to finally publish this one, but here it is! After a bit of encouraging from reviewers (you know who you are! ;) ) I finally gave myself a kick in the butt and finished this next chapter. I hope you guys like it, and are still interested :D thanks a lot for your support, you guys are wonderful readers 3 \o/


	11. Chapter 11

Haru rushed outside onto the dark, black street, his feet hitting sharply against the pavement as he slowed down to stand in front of the stormy girl. Her entire frame was comparable to a rainstorm. Her ink-black hair blew around her body in beautiful mess, her eyes like lightning and her fists balled up, threatening to strike him down if he got any closer. It was surprising how she could still run while wearing high-heeled boots that reached her knees, but this meant little to nothing to Haru. All he could think of was how she was right there, in front of him. He wouldn't let her get away this time.

"Rin!" he called, but she kept running. Apparently she knew he was there. With a rustle of clothing he ran after her, adrenaline fuelling his body. Her black hair flowed behind her like a wave, and he caught her by the arm roughly when he got close enough, not daring to go easy on her just because she was, well, _Rin_. She was not to be taken lightly, ever. He had learned that well enough over the past years. She spun around, her eyes fierce even though she knew she was caught.

"What do you want?" she snapped. "Are you going to tell me all about your new little girl friend? Or will you just pretend like nobody knows?" Her words crackled like a whip and her tone dripped with venom. Haru didn't flinch, but his stone-cold eyes bored deeply into hers.

"Rin, we need to talk." he tried to stress the importance, but she continued to stare furiously at him, blocking out his words. He persisted. "About us."

"There's nothing _about us_ anymore, Haru." she said flatly, still struggling in his grip, twisting this way and that. For such a skinny girl, she was surprisingly well-muscled. Haru looked into her eyes as they widened in surprise.

"Then why are you acting like you're so jealous?" he asked quietly. Rin looked at him in amazement for a few seconds, but then pushed him away roughly, and he let her go. She didn't run, and he knew she wouldn't.

"Don't touch me." she shook her arms, as if his fingers had burned her.

"Ok, fine, I won't." he muttered. Rin's eyes remained just as guarded; she could never be sure of him.

Haru watched her through the dim, pulsating lights of the city; she wore a short skirt, a revealing top, and her leather boots. Attractive. He remembered the days he would hold her in his arms, the only sound between them the beating of their hearts. But now all she would do was push him away. Finally her eyes returned to him, furious. He found that made her even more beautiful. Or maybe he had always seen her that way. Maybe just being in her presence made her beautiful to him.

"I came here to warn you." she said shortly.

"About what?" he asked.

"The Zodiac members are being divided. I overheard this from members of the family. It seems people are being picked and others labeled as traitors."

"Dividing the zodiac?" he shook his head, running a hand over his hair. "This doesn't make any sense."

"Better start believing it." she said dryly. "Because it's true. Starting today the selection's being put into place." Haru stalked around the street, attempting to absorb this new information. Rin watched him with crossed arms. "It's not about Tohru anymore, Haru. Can't you see that? It's about something much bigger than that."

Haru took a moment to think, silently looking away, then met her eyes, his own dark and holding some deep thought.

"What side are _you_ on?" he asked.

"It all depends." she said. She seemed to struggle with her words as she added quietly, almost in a whisper, "And you?"

"Same answer." he said. It seemed as though now they were sharing a private discussion, whereas before it had been a yelling match. Both of them were filled with a kind of longing, a kind of sadness, but were too afraid to express their feelings. Haru wondered if they were even speaking about the zodiac anymore, or about them. _It all depends_. Her words rang through his mind, and he had a feeling that they wouldn't stop for a while yet.

"Just think of where your loyalty lies, Haru." she said, her dark hair blowing wildly in the wind. "I'll be waiting to hear your answer." Then she turned and ran off, too quickly for him to call out her name or stop her. _Damn_.

Haru didn't know whether he felt sad or empty about what had just happened. Now none of that matters, though, he thought. There were more important things happening than his feelings, however much of a lost cause they might be. He knew that he had to do something, and soon. No matter what Rin had said, Tohru was still the most important thing if the zodiac members against them were after her. He cursed aloud, which didn't help but made things a whole lot easier to deal with.

He would help make this right, in his own way. He had to. And that's when he knew he had a plan.

--------------------

I felt my hands shake as I picked up my food, my stomach churning. I was eating outdoors, near a river, with Hana and Yuki. I tried to concentrate on the task at hand, but my mind kept wandering frantically away.

Something had happened, _then_—at the festival. I had just gone to look at all the pretty things and see the sights—and then I had seen _him_. Kyo. It was still a mystery to me how I knew his name, but I did.

I took a deep breath in, feeling the inside of my stomach squirm with anxiety as tears filled the sides of my eyes. I guess it scared me—knowing but not knowing. And then _feeling_ emotions that I had never felt before for anyone…

But that was hardly the most interesting part of it all, the feelings. He had walked up toward me. It was all very intimidating, really, no matter how breathless or overrun with emotions I was—his girlfriend was staring at me so intensely I thought I would melt on the spot. So I ran. It was foolish, it was ungraceful, I know—but I couldn't help it. It was like an instinct.

And the silliest part of it all is that he followed me.

* * * *

I thought I had escaped him. But he was right behind me the whole time. For some reason this seemed almost like a ritual now; running, being chased, running…it was like I was following a rhythm. But this time I didn't play the melody alone.

He caught up with me, panting and out of breath. I felt my nerves on edge and I didn't know which way to go. Thoughts were speeding through my mind, telling me what to do, and I worried over each course of action. _I don't know what to do_!

"Tohru," he spoke finally, breathless. I felt like running again, fear pulsing through my veins and I realized my heart beat quickened at the sound of his voice. I tried to choke it down.

"Tohru." he repeated, and tentavily stepped closer to me. Why was I so scared of him? _No_, I decided, _this isn't fear. It's sadness_. It was sadness like I had lost someone. It didn't make any sense. I didn't want to cry in front of a stranger, but my emotions were running too high.

I let my tears fall, closing my eyes, and then opened them to look up at him. He was very close now, only a few inches of space between us, his gaze intent. And when I looked up and saw his calm face, I realized that I knew him, but my mind struggled to piece together memories with his face.

"I…" All fear or sadness had left me completely, now overrun with a kind of mist overlapping my mind. He seemed ready to grab my shoulders, he was so tense.

"What? Tohru, say something, what?" he asked, throwing out each question so quickly.

"Kyo." I said, and a smile spread unto my lips as if the sun had just filtered through a cloud, as if all the answers were finally there, on his face, in his eyes.

"_Yes_." he said, and I could have sworn I saw the same happiness in his eyes in that instant. Everything in the world suddenly seemed to shine, as if everything was set right. I think I speak for us both when I say I felt as though I could have faced anything in the world at that moment. "I've been waiting so long to tell you, so now I can finally say it."

And then he reached out and hugged me, pressing me to his chest for only an instant, his face in my hair and I felt a wetness on my head and I realized he was crying, too.

"I don't know why I'm so joyful right now," I remarked, digging my face into the crook of his shoulder.

"Does it really matter?" he asked, and I realized the truth of his words. "I just can't believe I'm…you're…we're hugging and nothing's.." he trailed off, wrapping his arms around me. I could feel his bracelet pressing against my head, in my hair, and my mind registered faintly that I could even smell him. My eyes shut tighter and wished that there was some way I could get nearer him, closer to his heart.

"Tohru, now that everything's okay, I need to tell you. I've missed you so much, and I--"

And then he was gone.

* * * *

I still can't explain it. It's like there's a blank in my memory, or a blackout or something—and the worst part is I can't even prove he was ever there. As if it had all been a daydream.

I considered my lunch, pretending to not be lost in my thoughts. No, I couldn't prove he was real. But those feelings I had had—that moment I had shared with him…whether it was real or not, it was something that I treasured.

I hoped I would meet someone like him some day, and maybe make a relationship work. When we had recognized each other, it had been beautiful. I wanted to love like that for real. It was strong, it was a bond—and it left a glowing impression of happiness on me that I couldn't explain.

"Tohru-kun?" Yuki said, as if he had been asking me a question and I hadn't answered.

"Huh?" I said, a little too loudly and surprised.

"You've barely touched your food at all, besides holding it near your face. Are you alright?"

"Uh, yeah, sorry." I said, feeling embarassed. "I was just lost in my thoughts for a while. But now I'm back! So how are you enjoying the lunch?"

"It's very good." Hana said, nodding. "These strawberries you grew taste excellent." she said, speaking now to Yuki. He blushed a bit.

"Thank you. Strawberries…well, they're my favorite." he looked at me when he said that, and I wondered if it had some second meaning I was unaware of.

"So, Yuki, you seemed kind of rushed when you arrived." I noted.

"Yeah, sorry I was late. Things have been tight with my family lately." There was a pause as I waited for him to explain, but he remained silent, returning to his lunch. I felt that maybe it was best not to ask why.

As it turns out, everyone enjoyed the food and we all talked pleasantly with each other. Yuki added comments here and there, seemingly casual, but I could tell there was some other meaning behind his words. He was checking on my safety, and I could tell this from more than just his words—every now and then his body language would become very defensive, protective—and he tended to ask me questions about how I was feeling. He might be able to hide it from most people, but I could tell.

And I noticed something else—whenever he would ask a question in that way, he would turn to look at Hana. It was as if he was confirming something with her. I wondered if they knew something I didn't.

Yuki didn't stay for long—at half past sharp he looked up and excused himself, saying he had to be somewhere and left in a rush. Hana and I had said our goodbyes, and I had held a little worry in my heart—I hoped things would work out with his family. Hana sat quietly sipping her iced drink and I picked at a strawberry desert Yuki had prepared.

"That was nice," Hana said, smiling.

"Yes, thank you, I'm glad you enjoyed it." I said, delighted. Hana paused, looking around at the trees. I waited patiently for her to speak; she seemed to be formulating her ideas. Finally she turned to look at me.

"I know why Yuki was here today." she said, her pale fingers gliding across her small plate as she spoke, a habit. "I could sense his waves emenating off of him from a mile away. He's nervous. I'm not sure about what, exactly—but most of all, he's worried for you. In a very protective way." I nodded; I could tell as much. "But I wanted you to know I'm a little worried, too. I don't want you to get hurt." Her last words seemed to drag on a bit, as if she was going to continue but didn't. I felt my arms go weak as she spoke—to think I had friends that cared so much for me!

"Hana, I'll be alright. Really, there's nothing to worry about." She smiled faintly as if she wished it were true, but didn't believe it. "Looks like I'll have to prove to both of you that I can take care of myself. I learned to do so when Mom died, and since then I've gotten a job and I'm doing a lot better in school. I know I hurt myself, but it was just once and now I'm back on my feet." I put as much enthusiasm into that little speech as I possibly could, to make sure she knew I meant it. She seemed consoled. I smiled back, glad I could calm my friend. We spent the rest of the time laughing, just like before.

---------

Hana passed her fingers through her hair, thinking, the long dark locks hanging loosely over her shoulders.

The lunch had gone well. She had managed to gather information about Tohru as well as meet with Yuki for the second time. She picked up the note that was left sitting near her. It was written in Yuki's neat, elegant script.

_Hanajima-san,__ I need you to keep preparing, and thank you. _

Shishou had told her all about what had happened to Tohru when she had visited him. He had told her that Tohru's memory had been erased by supernatural powers, something that she understood very well since she had such powers herself. She had been curious and had asked many questions, which he answered—but afterwards he had made her promise not to speak a word of it to anyone she couldn't trust. He didn't have to explain why; she understood that the circumstances were serious.

Hana stretched out her hand and watched as sparks of something resembling electricity ran across her fingers. She had a plan to help Tohru, but she wouldn't be doing it alone.

She had a group. They would rebel against anyone who stood in their way.

--------

Kyo walked along the street, holding the letter his family had sent him tightly in his left hand, the one that was asking him to move away and leave all this world behind. He looked down, briefly drifting off into his thoughts, into his memories; delving into the reality of what had happened only days ago.

Tohru had remembered him again. It was true, what Yuki had said—she was remembering more and more. He would have to congratulate him the next time he saw him, for being right (for once). The feelings he had felt during those few moments….they were the happiest seconds of his life. He had almost gotten the chance to tell her what he had been waiting to say but right before the words escaped his mouth he had transformed.

He had never felt more like a human being than he had when he had been with her. It was as if ever single part of him had been relieved, as if the weight of the world had been lifted off his shoulders and suddenly she was there, and she was Tohru again, and that was all that had mattered. He had felt shaken, he had felt light headed, and the only word he knew anymore was her name.

But when he had received that letter—it was difficult to explain. His entire life had been centered around being exiled and confined when he reached an adult age, but now they offered him freedom. They offered him a life; all he had to do was leave all of this behind. Everything he worked for, every relationship he built, every dream he had—he had to throw it away.

Kyo pushed the door open roughly, arrogantly. He wasn't about to be polite to the people who had worked so hard to screw up his life. As he had expected, there were family members there, caught by surprise. Good. He wanted them to be schocked. In a way, he saw this like a martial arts match. He didn't set the rules, but he struck at his opponent hard every time he or she looked weak. _Looks like it's time to fight_.

Kyo looked a way, a split second of decision. _Tohru_. She was etched into his very being—every breath and every step he took was about her. He knew it was too late to be thinking about this, that he had already made his decision—but he couldn't help it. It was almost a reflex now.

"I've decided." he said, pushing back his thoughts and the pain in his chest. "I'm leaving."

Sometimes love isn't enough. We make our own choices. Sometimes feelings don't cope with those decisions, and sometimes they run achingly through our veins for years. Kyo knew he would have to deal with that for the rest of his life, but he had to move forward.

He had a new life to live.


End file.
